YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2016.11.23

Twitter has been left red-faced after it briefly suspended its CEO Jack Dorsey’s account! A whole bevy of Twitter accounts were accidentally suspended late Tuesday before being restored.

The reasons for the suspensions aren’t clear, but don’t worry, I’m sure your favorite racists are still on Twitter, getting ready to harass Leslie Jones and other women right quick!

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NASA recently said that it almost, once again, discovered life on Mars. This time, the almost proof was in the form of silica deposits that are formed into shapes similar to shapes produced by microbial life on Earth. NASA has been on a hunt to find life on Mars, or perhaps, to absolutely close the door on there being any life on Mars.

“We’re just checking that the place is really empty. We may need to move to Mars sooner than we planned at this rate,” said a NASA spokesperson.

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The Trump Foundation recently admitted to a bevy of criminal violations, including violations of IRS rules. Some of the violations include illegal campaign contributions to the Florida attorney General in exchange for ending lawsuits against Trump University, and self-dealing. Self-dealing is the illegal practice of using a charitable foundation for personal enrichment.

In response, most US media, the Trump administration and other Republicans have called for further investigations into the Clinton Foundation.

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Happy Almost Thanksgiving! Here’s hoping you enjoy tomorrow’s obesity feast with abandon!

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