YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.01.28

Human dumpster fire Donald Трамп signed an executive order banning Muslims from 7 countries from entering the United States, in an apparent attempt to keep at least one of his campaign promises.

Organizers spontaneously rallied at airports around the country, including at JFK, to voice their dissent. Among the organizers were lawyers to help people trapped at the airport, including people who had already been granted approval to come to the United States. Witnesses, including me, saw children being placed in handcuffs.

Reports say that Трамп is saying it’s not a Muslim ban, but that every time he says that he winks, which means, yes, this is an attempt at a Muslim ban.

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Less than 24 hours after Трамп signed an executive order banning Muslims from seven predominantly Muslim countries from entering the United States, the impact was already resonating at airports around the world. Chaos has erupted across the United States and at airports around the world, as people are confused about who is and isn’t allowed to come into the country, and about the very legality of the Executive Order itself.

Rumors say that Sean Spicer is planning to appear at a press conference soon and say, “Everything’s fine, nothing is going wrong, we’re a well-oiled machine around here,” over and over again to reporter’s questions.

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Meanwhile, in British news, actor Sir John Hurt has died at the age of 77. Hurt, known for his roles in Alien, the Elephant Man, Doctor Who and countless stage and screen appearances had pancreatic cancer.

Other old person unfortunately still alive: Donald Трамп.

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Yeesh, that’s pretty dark! I don’t really want Трамп to die.

I’m actually hopeful he lives long enough to see the inside of a prison cell.

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