YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.02.18

Wow, with less than one month into his term, holding a 38% approval rating, and a 56% disapproval rating of his performance thanks to a White House in chaos, it looks like most of America is deeply disappointed with the work of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. Everything from a hastily enacted Muslim ban, a botched raid in Yemen that led to the death of a Navy Seal and 9 children, to secret ICE raids breaking up families, to the recent ouster of Michael Flynn from his position as National Security Advisor due to repeated, illegal contacts with the Russian government, points to a White House in chaos.

Трамп, naturally, refutes this idea, and went to, you guessed it, Twitter to refute reality. THis morning he said, “Don’t believe the main stream (fake news) media.The White House is running VERY WELL. I inherited a MESS and am in the process of fixing it.”

And last night, he said, “The FAKE NEWS media (failing @nytimes, @NBCNews, @ABC, @CBS, @CNN) is not my enemy, it is the enemy of the American People!”

Based on what’s been going on, everyone in America is pretty sure they know who on Twitter with a name that rhymes with “Ronald Dump” is acting like an enemy of the American people right now.

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Speaking of reporting on a chaotic White House based on factual accounts that popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп chooses to ignore, did you hear what happened to new HUD Secretary and perpetually sleepy looking guy Ben Carson? Apparently, Carson’s top aid, Republican consultant Shermichael Singleton, was fired because he wrote an Op-Ed a few months ago that said Trump was taking the Republican Party to a “new moral low.”

Singleton said, “We allowed that hostile takeover to happen on our watch … This individual recognized a moment of great disparity in the Republican base and, like cancer, attacked and spread, consuming everything in his path.”

To top it off, apparently, Singleton was fired without consulting Carson, who only learned of the firing after the fact.

In fairness to the Трамп regime, though, Ben Carson can be a little dopey. Maybe he just forgot that his staffer got fired? Hard to say these days, hard to say.

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Speaking of the right hand not knowing what the left hand is doing, Vice-President Mike Pence recently vowed to ‘hold Russia accountable’ while speaking with an anxious audience at the Munich International Security Conference this Saturday.  

Pence has also reportedly told people that Трамп’s hair is real, so, might want to take that with a grain of salt.

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Have you ever noticed that Donald Трамп never mentions USA Today in his rants about fake news? What’s amazing is, just about everything he calls Fake News is reported IN USA Today. Same goes for the Associated Press, Reuters, The LA Times, The Washington Post, PBS, NPR, the Wall Street Journal. And that’s not even the tip of the iceberg of media in the United States, let alone the rest of Planet Earth.

I mean, that’s the bubble this guy lives in, he doesn’t read, he watches a limited amount of TV, and he doesn’t realize that there are all these other media sources saying the exact same things. It’s like having a relative who reaches into your fridge and complains, “The only thing you guys have to drink is Miller Lite and it sucks!” and never notices the bottle of water, the orange juice or an entire rack of Guiness in the back of the fridge staring him IN THE FACE EVERY TIME HE OPENS THE FRIDGE.

Except, he also has the ability to say, “Fire the Nukes!” So, yeah, we’ve given the nuclear codes to a guy who’s just like a guy that can’t tell what’s in a refrigerator. On the bright side of things, with the planet heating up, there’s a good chance we could die of heat exhaustion before the year is out, so, more good news folks!

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

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