YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.30

US forces have begun patrolling part of the Turkey-Syria border after Turkish airstrikes in the area killed fighters from 2 Iraqi Kurdish groups, The People’s Protection Units (YPG) and the Peshmerga. The Turkish government considers these groups terrorists.

Ankara denies deliberately targeting them. US troops are trying to stop the outbreak of violence between two of their closest allies in the region from escalating.

When asked for a comment about the fragile state of affairs among allies, no one from the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп was available because they were all getting meatloaf at an undisclosed location.

———

U.S. intelligence forces are alarmed by increased build up of Russian forces in the Arctic, including near the border of Finland in the Murmansk region. A former Soviet base in the area was refurbished and reopend in 2015.

A spokesperson for the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп said there is great concern about the build-up in the White House. Speaking on condition of anonymity, the spokesperson said, “Трамп is really worried that Putin wants him to move up north. I mean, the guy likes his ice-cream … look at him … but he’s not really THAT into cold weather, y’know?”

———

USA Today columnist Jill Lawrence published a piece today describing popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп as a nightmare negotiating partner. She went on at length about how mercurial Трамп is, describing his reversals on NAFTA, medicaid policy and more. Lawrence pointed out that Трамп’s lack of knowledge and experience is hurting the ability to make even basic political deals and compromise in Washington, D.C., effectively paralyzing the government on matters of substance.

Meanwhile, CNN ran a cat video!

Yes, USA Today, the free newspaper you get at the hotel that often makes more sense than the New York Times, lately.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

US troops patrol Turkey-Syria border after Turkish strikes on Kurds
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/30/middleeast/turkey-syria-us-troops-patrol/

U.S. Closely Watching Russia’s Arctic Military Build Up
http://www.nbcnews.com/nightly-news/video/u-s-closely-watching-russia-s-arctic-military-build-up-933331523964

Trump is a nightmare negotiating partner: Jill Lawrence
https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2017/04/30/trump-nightmare-negotiating-partner-jill-lawrence-column/101127744/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.29

It’s officially day 100 of the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп, and it’s time to score his Contract with the American voter, a series of policies that Трамп promised to implement within the first 100 days of his regime. Most of these have gone unfulfilled, perhaps none more spectacularly than his fifth promise to enact, “… a lifetime ban on White House officials lobbying on behalf of a foreign government,” which multiple former officials have already violated, including General Michael Flynn.

The first clue that Трамп wasn’t going to fulfill these promises was when he formed it into a contract, a type of business document that Трамп has a history of not honoring.

———

Five members of a white supremacist group called the Aryan Strikeforce have been arrested on federal racketeering charges and the alleged sale of meth and guns to generate money to fund the group’s activities.

White supremacists groups still uncharged as of today: Donald Трамп’s cabinet!

———

The U.S. Department of Agriculture is preparing to ease school lunch regulations created under former President Barack Obama. On day 99 of the Трамп regime, Secretary of Agriculture Sonny Perdue announced new rules that allow for “regulatory flexibility” for the National School Lunch Program at a Virginia elementary school on Monday.

In related news, the new menus for a Virginia elementary school will be released on Monday. Among the new items on the menu …

– Monday: Expired Peanut Butter!
– Tuesday: Sawdust
– Wednesday: Used French Fry Grease!
– Thursday: Dry Grass and Lawn Clippings!
– Friday: Bat Milk!

Things are looking up in American School Lunch!

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Donald Trump’s Contract with the American Voter
https://assets.donaldjtrump.com/_landings/contract/O-TRU-102316-Contractv02.pdf

USA TODAY exclusive: Hundreds allege Donald Trump doesn’t pay his bills
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/elections/2016/06/09/donald-trump-unpaid-bills-republican-president-laswuits/85297274/

5 members of white supremacist group face gun, meth charges
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/04/29/5-members-white-supremacist-group-face-gun-meth-charges/101065450/

Trump Administration Eyes Loosening School Lunch Regulations
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/trump-administration-eyes-loosening-school-lunch-regulations-n752756

 

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.28

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп talked to Reuters and said that being President is a lot of work, and he misses his old life.

“I loved my previous life. I had so many things going … this is more work than in my previous life,” he told Reuters. “I thought it would be easier.”

For anyone following along, with that statement, Donald Трамп joins the majority of Americans who voted for Hillary Clinton in wishing she was President right now.

———

Economic growth in the U.S. slowed in the first quarter of the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп to its slowest pace in three years. The rate was 0.7% in the first quarter of the year as consumers hang on to their money and businesses choose not to invest. Most economists expect the rest of 2017 to perform strong, though.

Going strong right now: The graft/theft economy that’s enriching Трамп and his family!

———

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп once again gave contradictory foreign policy statements at odds with other people in his regime. While former Exxon CEO, possible Russian ally and current Secretary of State Rex Tillerson tries to negotiate peace with North Korea, Трамп himself is already talking about war. Again.

“There is a chance that we could end up having a major, major conflict with North Korea,” Трампtold Reuters, amid an ongoing standoff over Pyongyang’s nuclear and missile programs. “We’d love to solve things diplomatically, but it’s very difficult,” Трамп said.

A White House spokesperson speaking on condition of anonymity said that Трамп has officially entered the, “Terrible Twos,” phase of his Presidency. “At this point, everything is too hard, he just wants to eat cake and relax, and he thinks everyone is mean if he doesn’t get his way.” The spokesperson continued and said, “We’re hoping to move him back on solid foods soon, and think his irritation may be due to teething issues.”

Anyway, we have a celebrity game show host for a President who behaves like a two year old and is about to blunder us into one or more wars around the world.

Happy First 100 Days of the Трамп Regime America!

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Donald Trump Misses His Old Job, Admits: ‘I Thought It Would Be Easier’
http://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/president-trumps-first-100-days/donald-trump-misses-his-old-job-admits-i-thought-it-n752341

Economy slows dramatically, growing a feeble 0.7% in Q1
https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2017/04/28/economy-posted-feeble-growth-q1/100995626/

Trump wary of ‘major, major’ conflict with North Korea as UN meets
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/27/politics/trump-north-korea-conflict/index.html

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.27

Former National Security Adviser to the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп, General Michael Flynn, was warned by the Defense Intelligence Agency in 2014 against accepting foreign payments as he entered retirement, according to new documents obtained by the House oversight committee, but did anyway.

When asked about the discrepancy, a Трамп regime spokesperson said, “Well, like, we always thought that warning was, like, a WARNING. Like when you’re boss says, ‘don’t get mad at meetings anymore,’ and you’re like, ‘okay,’ and whatever.”

Before a reporter could ask a follow-up question, the spokesperson ran out of the room.

———

White House officials said this morning that popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп was considering a draft executive order to pull out of NAFTA.

Hours later, Трамп told the leaders of Mexico and Canada that he will not pull out of the North American Free Trade Agreement.

And then, CNN had video of Трамп saying, “He might.”

Ladies and Gentleman, a round of applause for the decisive of mind and crystal clear communication skills of our first social media President, Donald Трамп.

———

Fox News perpetual guest Jesse Watters is under fire for a lewd sexual gesture and insinuation he made on a Fox News show about Ivanka Трамп, the 35 year old daughter of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп.

On Tuesday’s episode of The Five, Watters criticized a Berlin crowd for booing Ivanka Трамп, “It’s funny, the left says they really respect women, and then when given an opportunity to respect a woman like that, they boo and hiss.”

But then he followed his commentary with a sexually lewd hand gesture and a smirk, adding: “So I don’t really get what’s going on here, but I really liked how she was speaking into that microphone.”

Fox Lawyers reportedly reminded Watters that lewd, gross, sexual comments about Ivanka Trump in public can ONLY be said by her father, Donald Trump.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Pentagon warned Flynn in 2014 against taking foreign payments; IG launches investigation
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/27/politics/michael-flynn-foreign-payments-investigation/index.html

White House: Trump Says U.S. Will Not Withdraw From NAFTA
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/white-house-trump-says-u-s-will-not-withdraw-nafta-n751731

Fox News host Jesse Watters under fire for Ivanka Trump comment
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/04/27/fox-news-jesse-watters-ivanka-trump/100959898/

Donald Trump’s unsettling record of comments about his daughter Ivanka
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-elections/donald-trump-ivanka-trump-creepiest-most-unsettling-comments-a-roundup-a7353876.html

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.26

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп attacked the federal judiciary again on Twitter over a ruling that halted his regime’s attempt to block funding to so-called “sanctuary” cities, including his hometown of New York City.

“First the Ninth Circuit rules against the ban & now it hits again on sanctuary cities-both ridiculous rulings. See you in the Supreme Court!” Трамп tweeted Wednesday morning.

Earlier in the week, perhaps in a bid to curry favor with the aforementioned Supreme Court, the Трамп regime announced they that they had a dinner scheduled with the Justices on Thursday, but, it turns out the Supreme Court did not receive a formal invitation. As of today, the dinner is now cancelled.

Regime aides say Трамп is planning to tell people he already won in the Supreme Court on Twitter later today.

———

NBC News recently did a deep report on people who voted for popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп, among them a 20 year old college student who described herself as a feminist.

Трамп voter Regan Murphy, a junior at Wilkes University, thinks Congress is the cause of any perceived failures and dismissed the infamous “grab them in the p-ssy” comment as “locker room talk.” She first voted in 2016.

“… he’s actually taking action like with the bombing in Syria,” she said. “We voted for him to make changes. If we voted for that change, then we can’t fight him on everything.”

No word on whether Murphy is aware that bombing foreign countries unilaterally is a long-standing tradition of American Foreign policy, or on whether she huffs paint for fun.

———

Speaking of changes that I guess Трамп voters are for, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп will sign an executive order today calling into question the future of dozens of national monuments proclaimed by the last three presidents to set aside millions of acres from development. The review is a precursor to shrinking national monuments and wildlife reserves.

White House aides say Трамп is hoping to open a new resort in the acreage, described as a combination golf course and animal wildlife hunting ground called, “The Shooting Range!” A coffee stained brochure mock-up described The Shooting Range as a, “place where you can shoot 18 holes of golf, then shoot 18 holes in the big game animal of your choice!”

Reportedly the new property will be managed by Ted Nugent in his new Executive Branch position of, “Secretary of Shooting Stuff!”

———

I’m actually slightly worried that ‘The Shooting Range’ and a Ted Nugent Executive Branch appointment are both real possibilities.

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump again thunders against judiciary
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/26/politics/trump-tweets-ninth-circuit-sanctuary-cities-order/index.html

Supreme Court Never Got A Formal Invitation For Dinner With Donald Trump
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/supreme-court-donald-trump-dinner_us_58ff30c4e4b0c46f07821537

This County Flipped From Obama to Trump. How Do Voters Feel Now?
http://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/president-trumps-first-100-days/county-flipped-obama-trump-how-do-voters-feel-now-n749076

Trump executive order could rescind national monuments
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/04/26/trump-executive-order-could-rescind-national-monuments/100914086/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.25

Ivanka Трамп, daughter of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп, defended her father at a women’s panel in Berlin Tuesday after attendees hissed and booed during a discussion on paid leave when she began describing her father as an advocate for women.

“He’s been a tremendous champion of supporting families and enabling them to thrive,” Ivanka Трамп said before the crowd started booing.

White House aides say that planning for a missile strike against Berlin has moved forward in earnest.

Donald Трамп is leaving most of the planning for the German missile strike to his generals, but has taken a personal interest in what kind of cake he wants to eat during the attack.

———

Speaking of Nazis and possible Marvel supervillains working in the White House, HYDRA Agent Seb Gorka recently attended a panel on fake news at Georgetown University on Monday.

Gorka took took a few questions about his work at Breitbart and links to a far right Hungarian group with Nazi ties. After five questions, Tazmal said, Gorka stood up and said the rest of the panel should have a chance to speak, then abruptly left. Gorka is a member of Vitezi Rend, an organization the United States Department of State characterizes as an organization, “Under the Direction of the Nazi Government of Germany.”

Eye-witnesses on the scene say that Gorka saw an Avengers Quinjet landing outside of the arena, and hustled it out quickly before, “That dastardly Keptin America and his cronies can foil my deadly plan!”

No word yet on what, exactly, Gorka’s nefarious scheme is ….

BUY THE NEXT ISSUE TO LEARN: THE DEADLY PLAN OF SEB GORKA AND HYDRA!

———

In an unusual move, the entire US Senate is being called to the White House for a briefing on North Korea from the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. The briefing, involving 100 senators as well as Secretary of State Rex Tillerson and Defence Secretary James Mattis, is being held on Wednesday.

A White House journalist reportedly overheard Seb Gorka in a Men’s room monologuing about a “deadly plan.”

Gorka reportedly said, “Yes, soon, the entire US Senate, and my enemies in the regime will all be in one room … and then I will unleash my deadly toxin, which will leave ME to share supreme control with Steve Bannon! HAHAHAHA! Soon, we will (unintelligible).” The rest of the quote was interrupted by a flushing toilet, and the journalist quickly left the Men’s room in fright.

WILL HYDRA AGENT SEB GORKA’S DEADLY PLAN WORK?
WHAT KIND OF CAKE WILL Donald Трамп EAT THIS WEEK?
WILL THE AVENGERS REACH THE WHITE HOUSE IN TIME?

Find out, in the next issue True Believers! EXCELSIOR!
———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

German crowd hisses, boos at Ivanka when she defends her dad
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/25/politics/ivanka-trump-germany-hisses/index.html

Sebastian Gorka, Trump Adviser Linked to Hungarian Right-Wing Group, Abruptly Leaves ‘Fake News’ Panel
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/sebastian-gorka-trump-adviser-linked-hungarian-right-wing-group-abruptly-n750451

9 FAM 302.7
(U) INELIGIBILITY BASED ON HUMAN RIGHTS VIOLATIONS – INA 212(A)(2)(G), INA 212(A)(3)(E), INA 212(A)(3)(G)
https://fam.state.gov/fam/09FAM/09FAM030207.html

North Korea nuclear: White House calls Senate to briefing
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-39694640

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.24

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп loves getting praise and compliments, so naturally he’s fuming on Twitter after recent polls show historically low approval ratings for the first 93 days of his regime.

“No matter how much I accomplish during the ridiculous standard of the first 100 days, & it has been a lot (including S.C.), media will kill!”

Presumably, Трамп is still talking about his ability to decisively remember the deliciousness of his chocolate cake when he decided to bomb Iraq, I mean, Syria.

———

Congress returns from a two-week break facing a deadline to keep the government operating while popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп to get SOMETHING, ANYTHING done on the legislative front aside from deporting women, children and old people from the country within his first 100 days in office.

Republican lawmakers and some political pundits are gearing up to blame a government shutdown on Democrats, despite Democrats holding a minority position in both the House and Senate.

Reports say Трамп is considering buying a dog, so he can blame it for eating his homework.

———

Well, it’s Confederate Memorial Day in some southern states clinging to their epic struggle to maintain the right to own human beings. The states of Mississippi and Alabama are officially closed today for Confederate Memorial Day, while Georgia has taken the option to close today but call the holiday, “State Holiday.”

Most other states are calling today, “You’re a Jerk Monday,” to officially commemorate this important holiday in celebration of slavery.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump’s grand plans collide with 100-day mark
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/24/politics/donald-trump-first-100-days-plans/index.html

Congress Aims to Avoid Shutdown as Trump Presses for 100-Day Wins
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/congress-aims-avoid-shutdown-trump-presses-100-day-wins-n749696

Confederate Memorial Day is still celebrated in these states
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/04/24/confederate-memorial-day-southern-states/100835694/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.23

Department of Homeland Security Secretary John Kelly told CNN’s Dana Bash on Sunday that he’s not going after the DREAMers. This is after several DREAMers, including DACA enrollee Juan Manuel Montes was deported from California to his native Mexico despite those protections.

“He told me to secure the Southwest border — all of our borders, and, of course, focusing now on the Southwest border — and to take the worst of those that are in our country illegally, take them — look for them and deport them,” said Kelly to Bash.

Later in the interview, Secretary Kelly began eating a banana in front of Bash and repeatedly said, “I’m not holding a banana, and I’m not eating right now,” between bites.

———

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has achieved a new record in his first 100 days in office, with almost two-thirds of Americans giving him poor marks according to results from a brand-new NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll.

Of those folks, forty-five percent of respondents say Трамп is off to a poor start, with an additional 19 percent saying Трамп is off to, “only a fair start.” 35 percent who think the president’s first three months in office have been either “good” or “great.”

White House aides reportedly told Трамп that a historic 19 percent of Americans think he’s, “fair,” 45 percent think he’s being treated, “poor,” and 35 percent think he’s making America, “great.”

Трамп reportedly rewarded himself with an Ice-Cream Sundae after hearing the news. Aides have maintained that Трамп prefers Ice-Cream Sundaes to Banana Splits because the Sundaes make his hands look bigger.

———

North Korea has kidnapped its third American Citizen over the weekend. South Korea’s Yonhap news agency reported that Korean-American Professor Tony Kim was arrested Friday at Pyongyang International Airport as he was attempting to leave the country.

When briefed on the news, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп reportedly said, “Are you sure that guy’s American? I thought Kim was a Chinese guy’s name? The guy, we had a guy in our kitchen once, he made the most BEAUTIFUL General Tso’s chicken, ever. That guy was Kim. Y’know, Kim is also a girl’s name, I’ve known a few Kims. And when I say know, I mean, I KNOW. You know what I mean. That guy right there knows what I mean. Anyway, let’s let China deal with getting that Chinese woman chef out of North Korea.”

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Sec. Kelly: DHS not targeting ‘dreamers’
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/21/politics/trump-dreamers/index.html

Trump tells DREAMers to ‘rest easy’ — but one in Mexico can’t
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2017/04/21/trump-tells-dreamers-to-rest-easy-responds-to-juan-manuel-montes-case/100757434/

Public Gives Trump Low Marks for First 100 Days: NBC News/WSJ Poll
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/public-gives-trump-low-marks-first-100-days-nbc-news-n749756

North Korea detains U.S. citizen; at least 3rd American being held
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2017/04/23/nkorea-detains-us-citizen-at-least-3rd-american-being-held/100812526/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.22

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has decided to abdicate his responsibilities as Commander-in-Chief in favor of giving his commanders more authority when it comes to carrying out military campaigns. This means that Трамп essentially lets his commanders do what they want.

Naturally, Трамп characterizes this as being in charge of what they do.

“What I do is I authorize my military,” Трамп said earlier this month on Twitter because of course he did.

Military leaders in Iraq, Afghanistan and elsewhere are starting to realize that being your own Commander-In-Chief carries heavy responsibilities according to CNN analyst John Kirby.

“They are beginning to also realize that when they make these decisions there are also larger implications they’ve got to be aware of,” Kirby told CNN’s Wolf Blitzer Friday.

No word yet on whether Трамп also realizes there are larger implications to decisions he makes.

———

Still smarting from the failure to pass a health care bill, Congressional leaders and popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп are working hard to try and pass a bill to again try and repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act, called Obamacare by most conservatives when they want to get angry about affordable health insurance.

The problems with the first attempt to pass their repeal and replace bill could be boiled down to trying to do a bill with haste, without time to understand the implications, that also essentially takes away health care from people were among the reasons that the first attempt to pass the bill failed.

So, this time, Трамп and his Republican allies are trying to pass this new bill that’s exactly the same with haste, without time to understand the implications, that also essentially takes away health care from people.

A White House aide said, “We’re hopeful we’ll be in a war with Syria or North Korea by the time the bill hits the news cycle, so that people won’t be so angry about losing their health insurance.”

———

The White House has dismissed U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy on Friday according to USA Today, and replaced him with Rear Admiral Sylvia Trent-Adams. Trent-Adams will serve as the acting Surgeon General and assume leadership of the U.S. Public Health Service Commissioned Corps.

When asked why the change, a Трамп regime spokesperson said, “Well, we’re trying to take away people’s health care, so, and when you go to war you want a military person on your side to fight against people. So we hired an Admiral! Did you see that? Our new Surgeon General is also an Admiral! That’s like a double Military rank! We’ll beat the enemy for sure!”

No word yet on whether Трамп realizes that the American people are not his enemy.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

How the military’s newfound independence could cause headaches for Trump
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/21/politics/donald-trump-military-independence/index.html

House GOP Moves Forward on a New Compromise Addition to Health Care
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/house-gop-moves-forward-new-compromise-addition-health-care-n749496

Surgeon general dismissed, replaced by Trump administration
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/04/21/surgeon-general-dismissed-replaced-trump-administration/100767454/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.21

Russian military aircraft were spotted flying off the coast of Alaska for the fourth time in four days. The last two days have included sightings of two Tu-95 nuclear-capable Bear bombers.

Naturally this morning, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп tweeted this …

“No matter how much I accomplish during the ridiculous standard of the first 100 days, & it has been a lot (including S.C.), media will kill!”

No word yet on whether Трамп is aware that he’s President today.

It’s also about 50/50 on whether that’s a good or bad thing for the country.

———

The U.S. continues to take active measures to prepare for the possibility of a nuclear test by North Korea, U.S. officials told NBC News, including the deployment of a special nuclear “sniffer” aircraft, drones, and U-2 spy planes.

Reportedly, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is really excited about the possibility of a war with North Korea, and has been spending days wondering what kind of desert he’s going to have to go with the start of a nuclear war with North Korea.

White House aides say Трамп feels a sundae is more Presidential because they make his hands look bigger.

———

Horrible racist Ted Nugent and probable smelly guy Kid Rock recently visited the White House as personal guests of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. Despite a world on the brink of war, Трамп had enough time to spend more than four-hours with his trashy new cool friends.

“It was like I was hanging out with a bunch of my rock ’n’ roll buddies or at a hunting camp,” Nugent told the Detroit Free Press.

Presumably, that means everyone drinking too much, peeing on furniture, and then spending time regaling people with stories of, “How I dodged the draft for the Vietnam War!”

White House aides say that Melania Трамп declined to hang out with the gross famous people entourage because she had the night off.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

4 times in 4 days: Russian military aircraft fly off US coast
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/21/politics/russian-bombers-tensions-trump/index.html

No matter how much I accomplish during the ridiculous standard of the first 100 days, & it has been a lot (including S.C.), media will kill!
https://twitter.com/realdonaldtrump/status/819865802849587200

U.S. Spy Planes Watching for Possible North Korea Nuke Test
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/u-s-spy-planes-watching-possible-north-korea-nuke-test-n749111

Ted Nugent tells tale of his night with Trump and Kid Rock
https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/nation-now/2017/04/21/ted-nugent-donald-trump-kid-rock-white-house/100736048/