In a move that surprises no one, Florida retiree and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is on his 7th trip to his private resort Mar-A-Lago. This time, Трамп headed to Florida late on Thursday afternoon, behaving like many white collar workers headed out for the Easter weekend who don’t have the ability to order the U.S. military to kill people.

Трамп’s jaunt to Mar-a-Lago has been made without his usual cadre of aides, and coincides with a closely watched anniversary in North Korea, where analysts have said the rogue regime may be preparing for a sixth nuclear test.

No word yet on what kind of dessert Трамп is planning to eat to go along with his next bombing campaign order from his resort. Sources say that Трамп may be planning to unveil a new dessert called the “Mother Of All Banana Splits” on Easter Sunday.


As previously noted, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is in Florida to choose cake to go with his next bombing run, which is looking more and more like North Korea.

The Трамп regime says they’ll launch what U.S. media is calling a “preemptive strike” against North Korea should officials become convinced that North Korea conducts a nuclear weapons test, multiple senior U.S. intelligence officials told NBC News.

When an intern asked a senior producer at NBC News how it logically makes any sense to call a strike preemptive when it occurs after-the-fact, and as punishment for testing nuclear weapons, the senior producer said, “Are you the one who got me the salad without beets? I’m not mad about it, just trying to place your face. But, please, don’t forget the beets. I tell that to everyone. It’s the little things that matter.”


Wisconsinite Joseph Jakubowski, who mailed a rambling 161-page manifesto to popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп a few weeks ago was arrested early this morning according to law enforcement officials. Jakubowsk has a history of anarchism,and his screed is largely centered around dismantling the government and organized religion according to law enforcement. He was considered armed and dangerous before being arrested this morning.

Meanwhile, Donald Трамп remains at large in Florida.


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As North Korea brews, Trump again in Mar-a-Lago

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Joseph Jakubowski, manhunt suspect who sent manifesto to Trump, captured in Wisconsin