Emmanuel Macron decisively defeated far-right white nationalist candidate Marie Le Pen in the second round of France’s presidential election recently.
Reports say that popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп will begrudgingly congratulate Le Pen then pretend he always supported him and not the white nationalist candidate.
Another American citizen has been detained by the North Korean government. U.S. citizen Kim Hak Song, who was working at Pyongyang Science and Technology University, was held for “hostile acts against the republic,” according to the North Korean government news service KCNA.
White House insiders are reporting that HYDRA leader Seb Gorka, currently working in an undisclosed capacity in the White House, is hoping that Kim Jong Un will eventually kidnap a blonde American woman.
“If the regime of Kim Jong Un would simply kidnap a pretty blonde woman, we would be instantly drawn into a war, that would let me go forward with my plans for the nuclear arsenal of the United States,” a source recorded Gorka saying in the White House bathroom.
In related news, the White House is preparing to announce a new ad campaign for Southern California, “Blondes love North Korea!” Dennis Rodman is set to star in the commercials.
Speaking of nefarious plans, known left-wing rag and practically socialist newspaper USA Today is reporting on a new cash grab from the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп.
In recent months, Трамп has headlined four big rallies to tout his agenda and attack media and political opponents. He’s recently began running a new $1.5 million television ad campaign claiming he has made great accomplishments that are going unreported by mainstream media.
Typically, Presidents use federal money to promote their messages and avoid overtly political ads until at least year 2 of their Presidencies. Трамп, however, started fundraising for his campaign on day 1 of his administration, allowing his regime to skirt ethics rules that bar taxpayer money be used for political purposes.
Lucky for Трамп, this is the least scandalous thing he’s done. Had this been the Obama administration, this would have been front page headlines for months. With Трамп, this is more of a, “Eh.” Which just goes to show, the best way to steal money from the people of the United States is to make sure to do it AFTER you’ve been the star of a reality TV show for a few years.
Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!
Why Macron’s victory is reassuring … and yet not
North Korea Detains Fourth American Citizen
President Trump seizes on election rules to push his agenda in new ways