YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.30

Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп went on Twitter this morning and said, “If Republican Senators are unable to pass what they are working on now, they should immediately REPEAL, and then REPLACE at a later date.”

Repealing the Affordable Care Act would cause massive destablization to the insurance market, which is already reeling due to non-payment of funds from Трамп’s White House. The most likely outcome of that destablization would be an increase in premiums.

Days after being elected, Трамп told CBS’s Lesley Stahl on “60 Minutes” that “It’ll be repeal and replace. It will be essentially, simultaneously. It will be various segments, you understand, but will most likely be on the same day or the same week, but probably, the same day, could be the same hour.” Трамп reiterated that position at a news conference as President-elect back in January. “We’re going to do it simultaneously. It’ll be just fine. We’re not going to have, like, a two-day period and we’re not going to have a two-year period where there’s nothing. It will be repealed and replaced.”

In related news, Donald Трамп once again told people that, yes, it’s his real hair up there and not a combover as everyone in the world with two eyes and a brain realized years ago.

————

Just hours after popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп’s travel order went into effect, the state of Hawaii went to federal court Thursday to challenge it, saying the order barred too many people.

The Supreme Court ruled Monday that Трамп’s order could be enforced in part until the court makes a final ruling on the order later this year. The order went into effect at 8 p.m. ET on Thursday.

In response Donald Трамп is planning to invade Hawaii as early as Sunday. He reportedly told aides from his private toilet in the White House, “Honolulu is clearly an ISIS training ground, because Barry Obama is from there, and we all know he founded ISIS, I have a good brain, my hands are huge, healthcare is easy, I love ice-cream, so let’s bomb Hawaii and keep America Safe Again!”

Donald Трамп then left the toilet without remembering to flush.

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An investigation by the international chemical weapons watchdog Organization for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons confirmed Friday that sarin nerve gas was used in a deadly April 4 attack on the Syrian town of Khan Sheikhoun, the latest confirmation of chemical weapons use in Syria’s civil war. The attack on Khan Sheikhoun killed more than 90 men, women and children, and sparked outrage around the world.

“I strongly condemn this atrocity, which wholly contradicts the norms enshrined in the Chemical Weapons Convention,” OPCW Director-General Ahmet Uzumcu said in a statement. “The perpetrators of this horrific attack must be held accountable for their crimes.”

After being briefed on the news, popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп exploded with outrage and screamed, “You know what the real atrocity is? Mika Brankowski’s face lift, she HAD A FACE LIFT, it’s a fact, but is that getting printed? Is it? We should just bomb Syria, to hell with it, just carpet bomb the whole place. You know what has great carpets, by the way? Mar-A-Lago. Let’s go now. Let’s go. Don’t tell Melania or that guy she’s with. Who’s that young guy that’s been hanging around her? You said he’s a Baron? Huh, he looks a little young to be a Baron, I always think of Barons as these really old guys, y’know? I should be a Baron. Baron Von Трамп. Let’s go get some meatloaf.”

It’s day 160 of the Трамп Regime!

————

Seriously, has anyone ever seen or heard Donald Трамп flush a toilet? Until I see proof, I’m going to just assume he doesn’t and leaves it to other people.

Keep calling your 2 Senators and your Representative about Health Care! And afterwards, if you get a chance to talk to your member of Congress, ask them about Representative Barbara Lee’s amendment to a recent House Appropriations Bill that would repeal the 2001 Authorized Use of Military Force, and encourage them to support her amendment. It would end President Трамп’s broad, sweeping powers to engage in overseas wars that no President should have.

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump: If GOP health care bill fails, repeal Obamacare now, replace later
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/30/politics/trump-healthcare-bill-twitter/index.html

Hawaii Challenges Enforcement of Trump Travel Order
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/lawyers-immigrant-groups-brace-enforcement-trump-travel-ban-n778361

OPCW probe: Sarin used in deadly attack in Syria
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2017/06/30/opcw-probe-sarin-used-deadly-attack-syria/442056001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.29

 

Media pundits and news outlets around the world were shocked by a shocking series of shocking tweets sent out this morning by popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. In the series of unhinged tweets, Трамп blasted Morning Joe co-host Mika Brzezinski for asking him for an interview at at Mar-a-Lago around the New Year’s Eve holiday while bleeding from her face.

“She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!” Трамп wrote on Twitter. This is another person that Трамп has attempted to bait into a confrontation in the media, just days after a similar tirade against former President Barrack Obama failed to solicit a reaction.

Various accounts of the meeting indicate that Mika Brzezinski wasn’t bleeding from her face, and that Трамп had said yes to the request for an interview at the time. Everyone from CNN to the BBC has noted the President’s shocking statements. Notably absent from these stories is any context of the other sexually aggressive, false, and lewd statements Трамп has said about women his entire life.

Pundits believe that the media will forget about his sexist comments about Mika Brzezinski in a week, possibly less if Трамп decides to attack someone else on Twitter.

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Speaking of awful things that popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп doesn’t want to talk about, the Supreme Court voted to uphold parts of his Muslim Travel Ban.

The State Department on Thursday determined who will be allowed into the U.S. from Iran, Sudan, Syria, Libya, Somalia and Yemen. People from those countries must prove a relationship with a parent, spouse, child, adult son or daughter, son-in-law, daughter-in-law or sibling already in the U.S. to enter the country. In addition, all existing visas will still be honored, State Department officials confirmed.

The court is expected to make a final ruling this year on the Constitutionality of banning people by ethnicity.

When told that his ban was going into effect, Трамп reportedly told staffers, “Did you see what Mika Bukowski said? She said I made it up. I never lie, I have the best brain, the best brain. Can you, get me Vladimir Putin on the phone. Yes, VLADIMIR PUTIN. I want to talk to him about this. It’s unbelievable. SHE HAD A FACE LIFT AND IT WAS BLEEDING. I saw it. Putin has all those listening devices at Mar-A-Lago, and those spy cameras, someone had to have a good picture and some tapes of it all. I checked my tapes, someone screwed something up because it’s not there. She’s the worst. Mike Breshneviskivick is fake news. She’s fake news!”

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Y’know, I gotta be honest here. On the one hand, it should always be shocking when someone acts like this. On the other hand, Трамп has literally raped women and bragged about sexual assault … and that RARELY gets mentioned when these stories happen. It sometimes feels like a lot of media outlets are dementia patients … sort of remembering some things, forgetting other things at crucial times. As for Трамп? He clearly thinks he’s on Celebrity Big Brother or possibly “The Real Househusbands of Washington, D.C.” He’s dying for that headline tomorrow, “Mika punches back, Трамп fires off …” that kind of thing.

Because, that man does NOT want to actually do the job of being President. At all. What he wants is the branding of the Presidency. And the longer he’s in the job, the more he’s going to take from that brand. It’s what he does. It’s what he’s always done.

Anyway, have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump tweets shocking assault on Brzezinski, Scarborough
http://money.cnn.com/2017/06/29/media/mika-brzezinski-donald-trump-tweet/index.html

U.S. Defines Who Can Enter Under Travel Ban
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/u-s-defines-who-can-enter-under-travel-ban-n778031

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.28

 

On Tuesday, Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders ordered the White House press corps to watch a video from conservative provocateur James O’Keefe, “whether it’s accurate or not.” The video was reported to show a CNN health team producer, John Bonifield, criticizing CNN’s treatment of the Trump-Russia story. Bonifield was taped without his knowledge. She took the opportunity to promote O’Keefe’s work.

“I think we have gone to a place where if the media can’t be trusted to report the news, then that’s a dangerous place for America. And I think if that’s the place where certain outlets are going, particularly for the purpose of spiking ratings, and if that’s coming directly from the top, then I think that’s even more scary, and certainly more disgraceful,” Sanders stated, which struck more than one reporter as ironic, given that James O’Keefe has repeatedly circulated actual fake news. In addition, Sanders was apparently promoting his work without knowing whether or not it was accurate.

That was too much for reporter Brian J. Karem, a correspondent for Playboy Magazine, who interrupted her and said, “Come on, you’re inflaming everybody right here, right now, with those words. This administration has done that as well. Why in the name of heaven — any one of us are replaceable, and any one of us, if we don’t get it right, the audience has the opportunity to turn the channel or not read us.

You have been elected to serve for four years at least. There is no option other than that. We’re here to ask you questions. You’re here to provide the answers. And what you just did is inflammatory to people all over the country who look at it and say, “See, once again, the president is right and everybody else out here is fake media.” And everybody out here is only trying to do their job.”

Sanders then said, “I think if anything has been inflamed, it’s the dishonesty that often takes place by the news media.”

It’s unclear at this time if Sanders was referring to James O’Keefe, who repeatedly doctors his videos and is literally dishonest.

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Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп went on Twitter tirade this morning, because it’s Wednesday, and attacked media sources over a New York Times story that noted Трамп doesn’t understand much about Health care.

“The failing @nytimes writes false story after false story about me. They don’t even call to verify the facts of a story. A Fake News Joke!,” he tweeted. “Some of the Fake News Media likes to say that I am not totally engaged in healthcare. Wrong, I know the subject well & want victory for U.S.”

The New York Times reported that when reporters asked Senate Majority Leader and human turtle Mitch McConnell, whether Трамп understood the details around the health care negotiations, McConnell’s head retreated into his suit and he smiled blandly in response.

So, this morning, CNN is running an op-ed from a correspondent that essentially restates what the New York Times already reported. And the story is just another remind that Трамп doesn’t understand what he’s doing, and Трамп attacks the press over it.

In other news, CNN will report on a story first reported by the New York Times, from a source from the Associated Press, that water is wet.

Трамп will later go on Twitter and call the breaking, “Water is Wet,” story fake news. Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders will then later demand reporters watch a video about, “Dry Water,” from James O’Keefe.

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Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has hired an army of lawyers to help deal with the investigation into his lies about and ties with the regime of Vladimir Putin.

Reports say that the lawyers feel a little out of their depth, since they aren’t sure who they can simply settle with. Attorneys for Трамп say that the President is willing to write a check for $10 million or more dollars with SOMEONE to just settle this lawsuit, like he does with every lawsuit.

The attorneys for Трамп are currently looking to hire a ‘Трамп Translator’ to help him understand why lying about Russia is different than lying about Трамп University or those women he sexually assaulted over the years.

————

CNN: They’re not great, but they’re better than Трамп

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

‘We can’t take the bullying anymore,’ says WH reporter
http://www.msnbc.com/morning-joe/watch/-we-can-t-take-the-bullying-anymore-says-wh-reporter-977862723997

A heroic Playboy reporter defended CNN’s honor at the White House press briefing
https://www.vox.com/2017/6/27/15882094/sarah-huckabee-sanders-brian-karem-press-briefing

James O’Keefe Brings His Dishonest, Doctored Videos To The World Of Political Campaigns
https://www.mediamatters.org/blog/2014/10/06/james-okeefe-brings-his-dishonest-doctored-vide/201026

Trump has never been big on detail
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/28/politics/trump-face-healthcare/index.html

Donald Trump and his team hired an army of lawyers for Russia investigation. Who made the list?
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/06/28/donald-trump-and-team-hire-team-lawyers-russia-investigation/430381001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.27

Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has taken to Twitter to attack former President Barack Obama, on everything from the “failure” of the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare) to questioning why Barack Obama ‘did nothing’ when faced with Russian attacks on the 2016 US Election.

Of course, less than a week ago, Трамп claimed that there was no Russian interference in the 2016 US Election to get him elected. Now he agrees there is, but that his election is Obama’s fault.

A White House aide secretly recorded Трамп on the bathroom ranting to a portable television about the issue and leaked a copy of the audio to us.

Трамп: I mean, look at the MESS the country is in right now. The absolute mess, and who’s fault is it? Obama. Yeah, even though he told the country about Russian interference, told my campaign, it’s not like he arrested us or killed us. I mean, this is all his fault. He had to know that I’m incapable of taking advice from a black guy, especially a guy I kept saying is a foreign Muslim terrorist which he is, by the way.

Трамп then left the bathroom without flushing. The aide said that Трамп blamed the floating turds left in the toilet on Barack Obama.

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Paul Manafort, a registered foreign agent who’s done work for Vladimir Putin in Russia and the Ukraine and was the former campaign manager for popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is a multimillionaire who earned his money via political graft and corruption.

Manafort was an advisor to the Ukraine’s Party of Regions and its leader Viktor Yanukovych, who was President of Ukraine from 2010-2014. The Party of Regions was a pro-Russian political party in the Ukraine that repeatedly disparaged America’s NATO alliance, much in the same way that Трамп has since taking office. Yanukovych was forcefully removed from office in 2014 after managing a brutal, corrupt dictatorship and currently lives in Russia in exile.

There’s no word yet on whether Manafort will help Donald Трамп move to Russia to live in exile after 2020.

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Speaking of disasterous scenarios that you hear about daily in the United States that sound like the plot of Michael Bay movies but are, in fact, actually happening … did you know that the plague has come to New Mexico? And not just any generic plague, the original, literal, grand daddy capital P PLAGUE is in New Mexico!

The New Mexico Department of Health said a 52-year-old woman and a 62-year-old woman were recently diagnosed with the plague in Santa Fe County, New Mexico. According to health officials, the first confirmed case of the plague this year occurred in June when a 63-year-old man contracted the plague. The plague is typically transmitted to humans through the bites of infected fleas, but can also be transmitted through contact with rodents or dead animals.

In related news, possible head vampire and current vampire Michael Pence reportedly visited New Mexico in the fall of 2016 to campaign for popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. According to folklore, vampires can bring the plague with them when they visit an area.

The Трамп regime has denied that Michael Pence is a vampire and that he visited New Mexico in June, which means at this point that both assertions are probably true.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump’s new foil: a silent Barack Obama
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/27/politics/donald-trump-barack-obama-history/index.html

Trump’s Russian reversal
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/opinion/editorial/bs-ed-0627-trump-20170626-story.html

What Did Ex-Trump Aide Paul Manafort Really Do in Ukraine
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/what-did-ex-trump-aide-paul-manafort-really-do-ukraine-n775431

Two more cases of human plague confirmed in New Mexico
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/06/27/the-plague-confirmed-santa-fe-new-mexico/103222226/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.26

 

Senator Susan Collins (R-MA) and Senator Ron Johnson (R-WI) expressed strong opposition to voting for the Senate’s health care bill before the July 4 recess.

“It’s hard for me to see the bill passing this week, but that’s up to the majority leader,” Collins said on ABC’s This Week. “We could well be in all night a couple of nights.”

Johnson said on NBC’s “Meet the Press” that, “I would like to delay the thing,” Johnson said. “There’s no way we should be voting on this next week. No way.”

Johnson was supported in his candidacy for the Senate by a $1 million ad buy in Wisconsin from the Koch Network, a supervillain cabal that literally thinks that the current Senate health care bill doesn’t go far enough to cut insurance from poor people, because it doesn’t completely defund Medicaid.

It’s unclear at this time how much the Koch Brothers are influencing Senator Collins in her opposition to the bill. Rumors say that the Koch Brothers may hire HYDRA to put mind-control leeches into her brain if Collins opposes the Senate Health Care bill on humanitarian grounds.

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Did you know Congress is considering a bill that would allow Airlines to advertise fares that don’t include taxes in them? At present, regulations require that Airlines include all taxes and fees in their fare prices whenever they advertise. Charlie Leocha, president of the advocacy group Travelers United, laid out how the rule works.

“Back in 2012, before DOT set rules to control deceptive advertising, airlines advertised transatlantic flights for $65. Of course, after reading the fine print a consumer found that the most inexpensive ticket cost more than $750,” Leocha said. “The FAA bill will allow airlines to return to that kind of anti-consumer misleading advertising.”

The bill from Rep. Bill Shuster (R-PA), says that it’s not unfair to advertise a low fair as long as the taxes and fees are clearly disclosed through a link or pop-up box on their web sites.

It’s unclear at this time if the taxes and fees would be allowed to be written in a 1pt or smaller font at this time.

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Pharma Bro and aspiring supervillain Martin Shkreli is set to go to trial today over federal securities fraud. He’s also blatantly defied his attorneys’ advice to lay low, instead appearing on camera as much as possible and trolling people on social media, much like popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп.

“I’m excited,” Shkreli said of the trial in a brief phone call last week to The Associated Press. “I can’t wait.”

The 34-year-old Shkreli “travels to the beat of a very unique drummer,” exasperated-sounding defense attorney Benjamin Brafman said at a pretrial hearing this month.

Columbia law professor John Coffee compared the situation to Трамп’s unruly tweeting habits. “A lawyer can caution him,” he said. “But just like Трамп, he doesn’t have to listen.”

The Трамп regime is planning to nominate Shkreli to run the FDA sometime in August, after Shkreli passes his HYDRA initiation ritual by slaughtering a baby deer in front of a bus of school children with his bare hands.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

GOP senators call for more time to debate, change health care bill
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/25/politics/susan-collins-ron-johnson-health-care/index.html

Koch network helping Ron Johnson with $1 million Wisconsin buy
http://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/senate-races/290431-koch-network-helping-ron-johnson-with-1-million-wisconsin-buy

House bill would allow airlines to exclude taxes from fare ads
https://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/flights/todayinthesky/2017/06/26/house-bill-would-allow-airlines-exclude-taxes-fare-ads/424870001/

‘Pharma Bro’ defies advice to keep quiet before fraud trial
http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/wireStory/pharma-bro-defies-advice-quiet-fraud-trial-48275240?cid=clicksource_4380645_1_hero_headlines_headlines_hed

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.25

 

Health and Human Services Secretary Tom Price defended the GOP health care plan Sunday from Republicans opposing the bill. The plan will lower taxes on wealthy people, take away health care from 27 million people, and raise costs on older people among other people.

Price said on CNN’s “State of the Union” that, “We want to make certain that health care is available to all Americans.”

An alternate headline for this story might be, “Tom Price Lies Through His Teeth to help Pass Tax Break for Millionaires!”

Feels accurate.

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Senator Ron Johnson (R-WI) spoke on NBC News “Meet The Press” that he wants to slow down the vote about the ACHA.

“There’s no way we should be voting on this next week. No way,” Johnson told host Chuck Todd.

Johnson would prefer not to rush the process, and would prefer to take people’s health care away after the July 4th holiday.

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Supervillain Corporate billionaire and Conservative icon Charles Koch praised popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп on Saturday. Koch singled out Трамп’s move to roll back environmental regulations and appoint conservatives to the federal bench.

“Overall, we’ve made tremendous progress on the federal level that we haven’t been able to make in the last 10 years,” James Davis, a spokesman for the Koch network, told reporters Saturday. The Koch Brothers and their network, including wealthy donors like former NFL player Deion Sanders, plans to raise and spend between $300 million and $400 million in the 2018 cycle to advance their policy and political agenda. This would top the $250 million they spent during the 2016 cycle.

One thing that officials of the Koch Network object to is the Republican health care plan to lower taxes on the wealthy and take away insurance from 27 million people … because it doesn’t take away health care from low-income residents. That’s not a joke.

Members of the Koch Network later set living Giraffes on fire and posed for pictures in front of the screaming animals to close the meeting.

The Koch Network is planning to meet with HYDRA and the Legion of Doom next week to work out a plan to sink California below the ocean in order to drive up the value of Nevada real estate.

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Someone on Twitter already made the joke that was on my mind while reading about the AHCA. Namely, that for the last twenty years or so, whenever I had writing classes, you were always taught to find ways to humanize your villains.

Like, if you wrote a scene or story where the villains do something like, say, have people in wheel chairs arrested for trying to speak to their members of Congress, someone would roll their eyes and say, “Ugh, what is this, a comic book? That’s so over the top it’s not believable.” What’s astonishing to me is that this kind of thing is happening now, and there’s a lot of people, a surprising number, who want to excuse this behavior. Because, it’s easier to pretend it’s not happening than to even muster up the will to do a tiny thing about it.

Anyway, I left some messages this morning, or at least tried. I’m not going to chap on my Senators or my Member of Congress. They’re doing everything they can. I just hope the rest of us are doing enough.

Seriously, the Russian government helped get Трамп elected … and that’s only the like maybe 3rd or 4th most important story right now. And by helped, I mean, it’s looking more and more like it wasn’t just memes and paid ads to help Трамп, it’s looking like they might have helped with voter suppression efforts. Like, hacked into election systems and removed voters kind of help. There were 200,000 people kicked off of the voter roles in Wisconsin, all Democrats. And Трамп only one Wisconsin by just over 20,000 votes. It was one of 5 states where the margin was JUST over 1% … which is JUST enough to prevent automatic recount efforts from kicking in.

And if you think, “Ugh, what is this, a comic book? That’s so over the top it’s not believable,” I just hope you’re right.

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Tom Price promises GOP won’t pull ‘rug out’ on health care
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/25/politics/tom-price-dean-heller-health-care/index.html

Sens. Johnson, Sanders: No Way Vote Should Happen on Healthcare Bill This Week
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/gop-sen-johnson-no-way-vote-should-happen-bill-week-n776446

Koch aides voice growing optimism for Trump moves
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/06/24/koch-aides-voice-growing-optimism-trump-moves/103170414/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.24

 

Thursday, popular vote loser, Russian-sponsored Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп again defended his position that interference in the 2016 US Election was just a hoax and didn’t happen. At 10:01 AM on June 22, 2017, Трамп tweeted, “…Why did Democratic National Committee turn down the DHS offer to protect against hacks (long prior to election). It’s all a big Dem HOAX!”

Later on June 22, 2017, the Washington Post reported something that many American already knew, that Vladimir Putin personally ordered interference in the 2016 US Election to help elect Donald Трамп to the U.S. Presidency. Putin feels that a Трамп presidency weakens the United States.

In response to that story, Трамп then tweeted yesterday at 8:43PM on June 23, 2017 that, “The Obama Administration knew far in advance of November 8th about election meddling by Russia. Did nothing about it. WHY?”

So, two days ago, Russian interference in the election was a hoax, but then yesterday, yes it did happen but it’s all Obama’s fault.

In related news, several White House staffers are threatening to quit over Donald Трамп’s farting habits. One anonymous staffer said, “The guy comes into a room, farts, then blames one of us for the fart. He also doesn’t flush, and it’s gross.”

At this time, the President denies that he uses the bathroom.

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Speaking of white nationalism, did you hear the latest on that front from the regime of popular vote loser, Russian-sponsored Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп? The Трамп regime has taken away funding for a group countering white nationalism.

Life After Hate is a group trying to help people get away from white nationalist terrorist organizations in the United States. In the final days of the Obama administration, the Department of Homeland Security, through their Counter Violent Extremism (CVE) program, granted Life After Hate $400,000 to help their work.

But after President Трамп was sworn in, the funding for the group was never delivered and the group was removed from the CVE program.

When asked to explain how this happened, a spokesperson for the Department of Homeland Security said, “Well, it’s awkward to fund a program like that when you’ve got a white nationalist like Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III leading the Justice Department. So we–” Agents of HYDRA quickly stormed the room, threw a smoke bomb, and removed the spokesperson before they could finish their thought.

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The New York Times published a story, strangely in their op/ed section, carefully noting every lie that popular vote loser, Russian-sponsored Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has told over 2017 so far.

But you know what’s not included in their story? Трамп’s hair. Seriously, every day, he wants us to look at that and assume that it’s not a combover. But it’s so obviously a combover! The omission of this clear lie from the New York Times story demands a correction.

There’s no word yet on when any reporter will ask anyone in the Трамп regime about ComboverGate.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Why did Democratic National Committee turn down the DHS offer to protect against hacks (long prior to election). It’s all a big Dem HOAX!”  – 10:01 AM · Jun 22, 2017
https://mobile.twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/877889199353077760

Struggle to punish Russia for Putin’s election assault
https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2017/world/national-security/obama-putin-election-hacking/?utm_term=.42dfe7f3d7aa

Just out: The Obama Administration knew far in advance of November 8th about election meddling by Russia. Did nothing about it. WHY? – 8:43 PM · Jun 23, 2017
https://mobile.twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/878413313188802560

Trump administration eliminates funding for group countering white nationalism
https://thinkprogress.org/white-nationalism-group-funding-f1d35fb5604e

T r u m p ’ s   L i e s
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2017/06/23/opinion/trumps-lies.html?_r=1

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.23

The Senate Republicans, led by human turtle Mitch McConnell, released their health care bill which we should all just call ТрампCare from now on. ТрампCare guts key provisions of Obamacare, mostly to allow some rich people to pay less taxes then they already do. Some pundits have focused on the gutting of the bill solely as a ‘rebuke’ to Obama and his achievement, apparently missing the bigger picture that a lot of people will get hurt by the bill.

The bill does help some people, though, and this is how it breaks down …

Who gets helped

  • If you’re between 20 to 29 years old, you could theoretically save money on your premiums
  • Healthy people who don’t go to the doctor much could buy less expensive plans that cover fewer services
  • Rich people would pay less in taxes.
  • Rich people could contribute more to Health Savings Accounts
  • Insurance companies get more subsidies from the Federal Government

Who gets hurt

  • Current Obamacare enrollees will pay more out-of-pocket for health care services.
  • People on low-cost plans will pay higher deductibles
  • 11 million lower-income American adults would likely be kicked off insurance
  • 70 million low-income children, parents, elderly and disabled Americans will get less coverage through Medicaid due to cuts
  • Senate Republicans would eliminate the cost-sharing subsidies
  • Americans in their 50s and early 60s would get charge up to 5 times more than younger enrollees, meaning adults ages 60 to 64 would see their annual premiums soar 22%
  • Fewer middle class Americans would qualify for subsidies
  • Those with pre-existing conditions or opioid addictions may receive fewer covered services.

So, to break this down, if you’re young and healthy, or old and rich, or some mix of that, this is great for you! Good times!

If you’re older, poorer, are sick, are part of the middle-class white epidemic of the opioid crisis, sorry Charlie, this bill isn’t for you.

Of course, this bill breaks a key promise that popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп made in 2015, not to cut medicaid. You can watch the video yourself here: http://www.cnn.com/videos/politics/2017/03/10/trump-promises-not-to-cut-medicaid-newday.cnn.

What’s unclear at this time, though, is how much, if any, this actually helps Трамп with his taxes. He’s got a lot of paper wealth, but he also owes a lot of money to overseas banks. In other words, he’s sort of a pretend super wealthy person.

The one thing that’s clear … the longer Трамп is President, the easier it is for lunatic Republicans in the House and Senate to hurt people with bills like this. And as long as Trump keeps signing those lunatic bills, the longer he can theoretically prevent his arrest for treason.

In other news, it’s over 123 degrees F in Qatar right now, making it too hot for everyone. It’s so hot there right now that cows can’t produce milk. It was so hot in Phoenix, Arizona recently that airplanes couldn’t fly.

Somehow, during the worst ecological disaster faced by the human species in the last 50,000 years began, one that our species created, we managed to elect as leader of the free world a man who thinks people don’t notice he has a combover.

His only real hope is that enough people are dumb enough not to notice how much he’s hurting them. And looking around lately, that might not be a bad hope with a lot of people.

Happy Friday!

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CALL YOUR SENATORS AND DEMAND THEY FIGHT TRUMPCARE TO THE END!

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Who gets hurt and who gets helped by the Senate health care bill
http://money.cnn.com/2017/06/23/news/economy/senate-health-care-hurt-helped/index.html

Donald Trump’s Wealth Is Fool’s Gold
http://time.com/4521851/donald-trumps-wealth/

Temperature is soaring; here are a few tips to deal with sunstrokes
https://www.thepeninsulaqatar.com/article/21/06/2017/Temperature-is-soaring-here-are-a-few-tips-to-deal-with-sunstrokes

There’s a scientific reason why hot weather has grounded planes at Phoenix airport
http://www.cnbc.com/2017/06/20/theres-a-scientific-reason-why-hot-weather-has-grounded-planes-at-phoenix-airport.html

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.22

 

Senate Majority Leader and human turtle Mitch McConnell released the closely guarded Senate health care bill to the public today. The bill was written in secret and is designed to repeal Obamacare, and eliminate health care for at least 27 million people. The bill primarily cuts Medicaid spending and eliminates taxes on wealthy Americans.

It’s unclear at this time how much popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп will owe in taxes if the bill is passed, given that he’s not actually rich because most of his money is sourced from undisclosed Russian and other foreign bank loans.

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Speaking of human paraquats, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп gave a stump speech in Cedar Rapids, Iowa and made a dramatic announcement. He said legislation would soon be introduced that would bar immigrants from receiving welfare benefits for at least five years.

Трамп told the crowd that, “those seeking admission into our country must be able to support themselves financially and should not use welfare for a period of at least five years.” Thousands at the Nuremberg-style rally exploded into extended applause.

Presumably, Трамп is unaware that this law already exists at the Federal Level. The “Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Reconciliation Act of 1996,” enacted under the Republican legislature and President Bill Clinton states immigrants are “not eligible for any federal means-tested public benefit” for five years beginning when they come into the country.

When asked if Трамп was aware of the existing law and had read it, a White House aide said, “We’re not sure Трамп knows how to read.”

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Buried underneath headlines about the upcoming repeal of Obamacare by Senate Republicans and whatever dumb thing popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп said in a speech or on Twitter was a stunning revelation from two of the nation’s top intelligence officials that Трамп personally asked them to say publicly that there was no collusion between his campaign and the Russian government to undermine the 2016 US Election.

The revelation was made to Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s team and Senate investigators, in separate meetings last week by Director of National Intelligence Dan Coats and National Security Agency Director Adm. Mike Rogers. Both described their interactions with the President about the Russia investigation as odd and uncomfortable.

It’s unclear at this time if they meant, “Awkward meetings with lots of innuendo,” or if they meant that Трамп grabbed them in their private parts while speaking to them.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Senate finally unveils secret health care bill
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/22/politics/senate-health-care-bill/index.html

Trump: Immigrants Should Not Get Welfare for at Least Five Years
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/trump-immigrants-should-not-get-welfare-least-five-years-n775336

Intel chiefs tell investigators Trump suggested they refute collusion with Russians
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/22/politics/intel-chiefs-trump-refute-collusion/index.html?utm_source=huffingtonpost.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=pubexchange

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.21

 

Republican Karen Handel is the newest Congresswoman after winning the Georgia 6th District special election. Handel replaces former Congressman Tom Price, who is currently serving in the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. Price won reelection to GA-6 in November 2016 with 201,088 votes, or 61.7% of the total. Handel won the special election with 134,595, or 51.9% of the vote, beating challenger Jon Ossoff by just over 10,000 votes. By some kind of coincidence, Ossoff also got almost the exact same vote total that Rodney Stookberry got in 2016. Handel was the former Secretary of State for Georgia; Ossoff’s prior experience in government was as a legislative aide to Democrat Hank Johnson (GA-6).

Instapundits around the country had hot-takes galore on the outcome! Republicans see this as a victory for Трамп’s policies nationally. Democrats are split on the proper hottake this morning, with some saying it was a near victory, and others saying that Ossoff was too centrist of a candidate.

When asked, “How do you explain that Ossoff got almost the same vote total as Stookberry?” none of the Instanpundits had an answer, because literally no one in media knows what they’re talking about this morning about the Georgia 6th Congressional District Race, other than Karen Handel won.

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Senator Kamala Harris released a summer playlist in the style of former President Barrack Obama, just in time to commemorate African-American Music Appreciation Month. Her playlist includes songs from Tupac, Dr. Dre, Al Green, the Jackson 5, and “Check the Rhime” by A Tribe Called Quest.

White House sources say that popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is considering releasing his own Spotify playlist to represent his current mood over the ongoing Russia investigation. The playlist is just one track on an endless loop, with the sound of a truck scraping along a pavement while Jim Carrey screams.

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A NATO F-16 attempted to approach the plane of Russian Defense Minister Sergei Shoigu in the Baltic Sea before being chased off by a Russian Su-27 fighter jet, according Russian media this morning. The Su-27, “displayed its weapons,” to the F-16, which then flew away.

A Pentagon spokesman referred questions on the incident to NATO, which had no immediate comment on the reports.

When briefed on the incident, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп reportedly said, “Y’know, I don’t get buzzed. I don’t get buzzed. I never drink. I don’t do drugs. Not a one. You know what I get buzzed on? Winning! That’s what I do. Like the way that Charlie Sheen, is it Martin? Martin Sheen? He was on that sitcom. Anyway, I get buzzed, and I’m winning, just like Martin Sheen did on that sitcom where he was President. Also, not a fan of Martin Sheen. Not a fan at all.”

The President then flushed the toilet and stopped talking to the Television as he left the restroom.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Georgia race: Republicans jittery about health care breathe sigh of relief
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/21/politics/republicans-health-care-georgia-win/index.html

Georgia’s 6th Congressional District election, 2016
https://ballotpedia.org/Georgia%27s_6th_Congressional_District_election,_2016

Georgia’s 6th Congressional District special election, 2017
https://ballotpedia.org/Georgia%27s_6th_Congressional_District_special_election,_2017

Sen. Kamala Harris Drops Her Summer Spotify Playlist
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/nbcblk/sen-kamala-harris-drops-her-summer-spotify-playlist-n774631

Reports: NATO jet buzzes Russian defense minister’s plane
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2017/06/21/reports-nato-jet-buzzes-russian-defense-ministers-plane/103062036/

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