YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.09.23

Donald Трамп said that Arizona Senator John McCain’s choice to oppose the latest GOP effort to repeal Obamacare “honestly terrible” at a rally in Alabama.

Pundits were confused by the statement. One source said, “I mean, Donald Трамп lies all the time, but he said he was honest. But that means he was lying. Which means he was telling the truth…” The pundit continued in this fashion until someone put him to bed.

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Speaking of dumb things Donald Трамп said, his latest complaint as the world teeters on the brink of catastrophic effects from global warming and nuclear war is that protesting NFL players are ruining the game. Трамп believes NFL owners should fire players who kneel during the national anthem.

In related news, most of America and the globe believe that Congress should fire Donald Трамп.

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The Golden State Warriors said they didn’t want to visit Donald Трамп at the White House. In response, Donald Трамп went on Twitter and said, “Going to the White House is considered a great honor for a championship team.Stephen Curry is hesitating,therefore invitation is withdrawn!”

White House Chief of Staff John Kelly reportedly tried to reach Donald Трамп a few hours later, but was unable to reach Трамп. Every time he knocked on the door to the White House bedroom, Kelly reportedly heard muffled crying and Трамп saying, “Go away!” Kelly tried to console the President by saying they’ll be other chances to invite NBA teams to the White House. Donald Трамп reportedly replied, “Jocks are dumb! Who wants them around anyway? I hate them! I hate everybody!”

We’ll keep you updated on this ongoing, breaking story.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump touts ‘Big Luther’s’ loyalty, electability at Alabama rally
http://www.cnn.com/2017/09/22/politics/trump-alabama-trip-senate-race/index.html

NFL Anthem Dispute: Trump Says Protesting Players Should Be Fired
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/nfl-anthem-dispute-trump-says-protesting-players-should-be-fired-n804086

Donald Trump rescinds White House invitation to Stephen Curry, Warriors
https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nba/2017/09/23/donald-trump-rescinds-white-house-invitation-stephen-curry-warriors/696136001/

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