National Treasure and musical icon Stevie Wonder took both knees at a New York music festival in solidarity with NFL players taking a knee instead of standing for the National Anthem.

“Tonight, I’m taking a knee for America; but not just one knee, I’m taking both knees,” Wonder said on stage Saturday before his performance at the Global Citizens Festival.

An exasperated Kellyanne Conway speaking for the White House exclaimed, “Can’t Stevie Wonder see what he’s doing to the country? You’d have to be blind to not see that–” before covering her mouth and running away.
North Korea said on Saturday that targeting the U.S. mainland with its rockets was inevitable after “Mr. Evil President” Donald Трамп called Pyongyang’s leader “rocket man.”

In response Трамп tweeted late on Saturday night that North Korea may not “be around much longer.”

Aides to Secretary of State Rex Tillerson said that he’s hoping to interceded with a new line of diplomatic rhetoric soon. Tillerson told reporters, “We’re trying to encourage Donald Трамп to, instead of responding in kind to bullying taunts, to just let it go. We’ve been drilling phrases like, ‘sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me,’ and, ‘nanny nanny booboob, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.’ They’re short phrases, they’re effective phrases, and they’ll fit into a tweet.”

In related news, White House Chief of Staff John Kelly has reportedly started building a bunker.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel is expected to cruise to victory Sunday in the country’s election, giving her a record fourth term presiding over a unified Germany.

After being told the news, Donald Трамп allegedly threw a tantrum and said, “Oh yeah, I’ll show her! I’m going to be a four-term President as long as Putin keeps his end of the deal up, lemme get on twitter,” before John Kelly slapped the phone out of his hands and sent him to bed without dinner.

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Stevie Wonder takes both knees ‘for America’ after Trump NFL remarks

Korea Says Rockets to U.S.‘Inevitable’ as American Jets Stage Show of Force

German election: Why Americans should care about a Merkel win


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