Miguel Perez Jr., a US Army veteran who served two tours of duty in Afghanistan, will be deported by the Трамп due to a felony drug conviction in 2010.

When asked to comment, Donald Трамп said, “Well, that’s what he gets for fighting for his country! He should’ve done what I did, and get out of it by pretending he had bone spurs,” before he was quickly led out of the room by General John Kelly.

Aides say that Kelly plans to take away The Donald’s ice cream privileges for the month, “to remind him to stay on script.”


Former CIA Director John Brennan said House Intelligence Committee Chairman Devin Nunes “abused” his office by issuing a memo with intelligence information.

Congressional staffers say that Nunes also likes to abuse himself in the bathroom every time he hears his name in the news.


It’s the Superbowl today! Whoever wins, just know, there’s probably going to be a riot led by white people that gets called, “excited celebration,” by every news outlet, except for in black neighborhoods where local police will probably show up with tear gas.

Enjoy eating a whole jar of Queso!


Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Veteran who served two tours in Afghanistan could be deported

Ex-CIA Director Brennan says Nunes “abused” his office with memo


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