YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2018.02.09

Gary Emineth, a Republican candidate for US Senate in North Dakota, said recently that no more mosques should be built in the United States. Emineth went on North Dakota’s WDAY AM970 to defend his position on the Rob (re)Port.

“So I just made a statement, I’m a Christian that believes we ought to propagate our Christian faith. So I see an article and I retweet, ‘no more mosques in America,’ you know, and like, and share. So I retweeted it. So yeah. So what?”

When someone pointed out that banning mosques would violate the First Amendment to the Constitution, Emineth said, “So it violates the first amendment, so it tramples on religious liberties, I’m like, y’know, I want to propagate my Christian faith so, First Amendment, so what?”

When asked later if he supports Donald Трамп despite his numerous infidelities, Emineth said, “So he banged around a little on his wife? I’m a Christian that believes, hey, you wanna bang around on your wife, you wanna a gumare, a chantausey on the side, badda-bing, badda-boom, whaddya ya gonna do about it, fuggedaboutit?”

By the end of the interview, Emineth had fully devolved into a full-blown Italian mobster stereotype worthy of an old episode of Mad TV! Emineth ended the interview by asking for some gravy like his ma used to make, marone!

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After a temporary lapse in government funding that lasted through the night, Congress passed a two-year spending deal early Friday. The funding is primarily financed through borrowing thanks to the Trump tax cuts.

When asked how the funding would be paid for, Donald Трамп said, “Eh, don’t worry about it, I do this kind of thing all the time. All the time folks. You borrow the money, you declare bankruptcy, you start a new company. We’ll do the same thing, folks, the same thing. Already got my eye on a new name. Donaldvania. Say it outloud, it grows on you. It grows on you folks.”

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Donald Трамп on Friday refused to authorize the release of a Democratic rebuttal to a Republican intelligence committee memo alleging that FBI and Justice Department officials abused their power to spy on former Trump campaign adviser Carter Page.

When asked why, Donald Трамп said, “Duh, because I’m a jerk!” Donald Трамп then made faces for five minutes, before transitioning to a jerk-off motion.

The New York Times reported the move as, “quite Presidential!”

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

GOP Senate candidate defends sharing tweet that called for ban on mosques: ‘So what?’
https://www.cnn.com/2018/02/09/politics/kfile-north-dakota-senate-candidate-radio-interview/index.html

After temporary shutdown, Congress passes two-year spending deal
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/congress-readies-vote-budget-deal-hoping-avoid-shutdown-n845961

Trump blocks release of Dem memo rebutting GOP claims of FBI surveillance abuse
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2018/02/09/trump-agrees-trump-authorizes-release-democratic-memo-rebutting-republican-claims-fbi-surveillance/317476002/

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