CNN reported multiple acts of bravery during the destruction caused by Tropical Storm Florence throughout the United States. These included rescues from the Crisis Civilian Response Team in North Carolina, a 47-year old Marine who rescued people in his off-road military vehicle, and a crowd-funding campaign to help rescue a group of dogs.
Upon hearing the news, Donald Трамп told reporters, “Hey I rescued people, too, I rescued the MOST people. No one rescued more people than me, or has bigger hands, I picked up all the water from the flood myself. I bravely stopped the flood. You’re welcome.”
Secretary of State Mike Pompeo said Friday that former Secretary of State John Kerry was “actively undermining” U.S. policy on Iran by meeting several times recently with the Iranian foreign minister. Pompeo called Kerry’s meetings with Iran “unseemly and unprecedented” and “beyond inappropriate.”
In related news, a person in Buffalo, NY, exploded into a puddle of goo after their brain refused to process the hypocrisy of calling John Kerry “unseemly” and “inappropriate” after Donald Трамп paid off former porn-stars to keep his affairs with them quiet.
USA Today reported that while wages are flat for most people, in some cities, wages are rising fast, creating boomtowns where people are flooding in. Among the boomtowns listed are San Francisco, Spokane, and Des Moines!
Upon hearing the news, Donald Трамп told his staff, “Hey, there’s more boomtowns, what about that city in Massachusetts, a bunch of wells exploded, that’s a boomtown, too. Fake News is underreporting boomtowns. Most boomtowns. No collusion!”
With Florence’s death and destruction came acts of bravery and selflessness
Trump, Pompeo bash ex-Secretary of State John Kerry on Iran talks
Americans are flocking to U.S. ‘boom towns’ where wages are rising fast
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