YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.08.14

The white nationalist who killed Charlottesville activist and resident Heather Heyer on Saturday by running over her with a Dodge Charger held extreme views, one of his former teachers told CNN on Sunday.

Derek Weimer, the former social studies teacher of the suspect, told CNN that the murderer, “… really had a fondness for Adolf Hitler.”

After being informed of the news, an official in the Трамп regime said, “What’s the big deal, a lot of have fondness for Adolf Hitler, too?” before being rushed away by agents of HYDRA.

————

USA Today reported that many of the voters who backed popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп but some are growing concerned with the way he’s doing the job of President.

So far unconcerned? Core Трамп supporters like Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard David Duke!

————

Current Vice President and possible head vampire Mike Pence defended Donald Трамп‘s response to the deadly violence at a white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, than on condemning the violence itself. Трамп claimed that the problem was violence, “on all sides,” rather than violence from White Nationalists.

Pence said he took issue with, “the fact that many in the media are spending more time criticizing how the president addressed the issue yesterday.”

When someone pointed out that news media like The Daily Stormer, a neo-Nazi website, praised Трамп’s remarks for not singling out American Nazis despite all the violence they engaged in, Pence bit the neck of a White House intern, drained their blood, then hissed as he turned into a cloud of smoke and left the room.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Teacher: Charlottesville car crash suspect discussed radical views
http://www.cnn.com/2017/08/12/us/charlottesville-car-crash-suspect-idd/index.html

Trouble in Trumpland: The president’s core supporters begin to worry
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/08/14/trumps-core-supporters-begin-worry-future-success/561903001/

Pence Defends Trump From Critics of Charlottesville Remarks
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/pence-defends-trump-critics-charlottesville-remarks-n792291

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Catch up back issues of YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA on …

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.07.26

 

Senate Republicans voted Tuesday afternoon to advance to floor debate on their effort to hurt millions of people by repealing the Affordable Care Act thanks to a tie-breaking from Vice President and probable head vampire Mike Pence. Senator John McCain, recently diagnosed with brain cancer, returned to the Senate to vote to help ensure a tie-vote that Pence could break. It looked like Pence had the Senate in his thrall …

… But then a few hours later, the Senate voted 43 to 57 to decisively reject a Republican proposal to repeal-and-replace Obamacare, a sign of the chaos expected to envelop Capitol Hill as GOP leaders work to find a plan their conference can agree to.

Experts say that Pence plans to visit several Republican Senators in the middle of the night to drain their blood, in order to put them more closely under his thrall.

————

Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп declassified a secret CIA program to arm Syrian rebels in a series of tweets attacking The Washington Post Monday night.

Трамп tweeted, “The Amazon Washington Post fabricated the facts on my ending massive, dangerous, and wasteful payments to Syrian rebels fighting Assad……” He went on to call the Post’s stories “Fake News” and accused the paper of being a “Lobbyist for Amazon and taxes.”

White House aides say that Трамп is planning to declassify other secret U.S. programs, but needs to confer with his manager, Russian President Vladimir Putin, on which program is the most important to reveal first.

————

Secretary of State Rex Tillerson is “taking a little time off,” according to State Department spokeswoman Heather Nauert. The announcement was made amid reports that Tillerson was resigning as Secretary of State.

The State Department said that former Exxon CEO Tillerson just needs, “3, maybe 4 years to recuperate,” before he’d even THINK of going back to work.

————

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Senate rejects proposal to repeal and replace Obamacare
http://www.cnn.com/2017/07/25/politics/senate-health-care-vote/index.html

Did Trump Declassify a Secret CIA Program With a Tweet?http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/did-trump-just-declassify-secret-cia-program-tweet-n786381

Sec. of State Tillerson ‘taking a little time off’ but not resigning
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/07/25/rex-tillerson-taking-little-time-off/510355001/

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Catch up back issues of YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA on …

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.27

Popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has taken to Twitter to attack former President Barack Obama, on everything from the “failure” of the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare) to questioning why Barack Obama ‘did nothing’ when faced with Russian attacks on the 2016 US Election.

Of course, less than a week ago, Трамп claimed that there was no Russian interference in the 2016 US Election to get him elected. Now he agrees there is, but that his election is Obama’s fault.

A White House aide secretly recorded Трамп on the bathroom ranting to a portable television about the issue and leaked a copy of the audio to us.

Трамп: I mean, look at the MESS the country is in right now. The absolute mess, and who’s fault is it? Obama. Yeah, even though he told the country about Russian interference, told my campaign, it’s not like he arrested us or killed us. I mean, this is all his fault. He had to know that I’m incapable of taking advice from a black guy, especially a guy I kept saying is a foreign Muslim terrorist which he is, by the way.

Трамп then left the bathroom without flushing. The aide said that Трамп blamed the floating turds left in the toilet on Barack Obama.

————

Paul Manafort, a registered foreign agent who’s done work for Vladimir Putin in Russia and the Ukraine and was the former campaign manager for popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is a multimillionaire who earned his money via political graft and corruption.

Manafort was an advisor to the Ukraine’s Party of Regions and its leader Viktor Yanukovych, who was President of Ukraine from 2010-2014. The Party of Regions was a pro-Russian political party in the Ukraine that repeatedly disparaged America’s NATO alliance, much in the same way that Трамп has since taking office. Yanukovych was forcefully removed from office in 2014 after managing a brutal, corrupt dictatorship and currently lives in Russia in exile.

There’s no word yet on whether Manafort will help Donald Трамп move to Russia to live in exile after 2020.

————

Speaking of disasterous scenarios that you hear about daily in the United States that sound like the plot of Michael Bay movies but are, in fact, actually happening … did you know that the plague has come to New Mexico? And not just any generic plague, the original, literal, grand daddy capital P PLAGUE is in New Mexico!

The New Mexico Department of Health said a 52-year-old woman and a 62-year-old woman were recently diagnosed with the plague in Santa Fe County, New Mexico. According to health officials, the first confirmed case of the plague this year occurred in June when a 63-year-old man contracted the plague. The plague is typically transmitted to humans through the bites of infected fleas, but can also be transmitted through contact with rodents or dead animals.

In related news, possible head vampire and current vampire Michael Pence reportedly visited New Mexico in the fall of 2016 to campaign for popular vote loser, Russian supported Presidential candidate and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп. According to folklore, vampires can bring the plague with them when they visit an area.

The Трамп regime has denied that Michael Pence is a vampire and that he visited New Mexico in June, which means at this point that both assertions are probably true.

————

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump’s new foil: a silent Barack Obama
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/27/politics/donald-trump-barack-obama-history/index.html

Trump’s Russian reversal
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/opinion/editorial/bs-ed-0627-trump-20170626-story.html

What Did Ex-Trump Aide Paul Manafort Really Do in Ukraine
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/what-did-ex-trump-aide-paul-manafort-really-do-ukraine-n775431

Two more cases of human plague confirmed in New Mexico
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/06/27/the-plague-confirmed-santa-fe-new-mexico/103222226/

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Catch up back issues of YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA on …

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.05.27

CNN reported this morning on a story reported by the Washington Post that revealed that Jared “The Kush” Kushner, son-in-law of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп, talked with Russian ambassador Sergei Kislyak about opening a ‘back-channel’ line of communication that would be invisible to U.S. intelligence services. The Kush suggested using the Russian embassy as a physical location for such discussions.

Former National Security advisor Michael Flynn was in attendance at the meeting where the clandestine communication channel was discussed. CNN quoted a story from The New York times that cited three people with knowledge of the discussion who backed up the claim.

So, that’s The Washington Post and The New York Times doing all of the investigative legwork for a story that CNN is now reporting.

In related news, CNN has been trying out a new motto for use on its cable channel, “CNN: We let other people do the investigative reporting because hey, we’re on TV!”

———

Former National Security Advisor to President Jimmy Carter, Zbigniew Brzezinski, died yesterday. His death was announced by his daughter, Mika Brzezinski, co-host of MSNBC’s “Morning Joe.”

“He was known to his friends as Zbig, to his grandchildren as Chief and to his wife as the enduring love of her life,” she said in a post on Instagram.

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп took a moment to offer remarks on the death of Zbig Brzezinski, and reportedly said, “Y’know, that Zibby Broznowski, he was a heck of a guy, really had a hot daughter, not as hot as the Ivanka, she’s so hot that she could be First Lady by the way, but, no, I’m kidding, he’s a good guy, he does the good things for people, and we should thank the Zipper Breezekinski for the things he’s doing. Good guy, great guy, hot daughter, even if her network is fake news. Hey, Zippy Buzzfeedski, tell your daughter to go work for a real network! What were we talking about?”

———

Current Vice-President and probable head vampire Mike Pence has left over 50 official records requests from his time as Indiana governor unfulfilled. Most of the requests are for his emails. Some are more than 10 months old.

The requests represent an unprecedented backlog, fueled in large part by increased interest in Pence after he became President Trump’s running mate last year.

When asked why he hadn’t provided the emails, a spokesperson for Mike Pence said, “You guys saw what happened to Hillary Clinton when emails came up. Pence needs to make sure there’s nothing incriminating about his ties to Russia in those emails before he provides them, it’s basic common sense, otherwise he’ll–”

The spokesperson was whisked away by Secret Service agents for “protection” before she could finish the rest of her sentence.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Washington Post: Kushner proposed secret communication channel with Kremlin
http://www.cnn.com/2017/05/26/politics/jared-kushner-russian-ambassador-kremlin/index.html

Zbigniew Brzezinski, Carter’s National Security Adviser, Dies at 89
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/zbigniew-brzezinski-carter-s-national-security-adviser-dies-89-n765351

Pence left dozens of records requests unfilled
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/05/26/vice-president-mike-pence-left-dozens-records-requests-unfilled-most-them-his-emails/350730001/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.05.10

Yesterday, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп fired FBI Director James “But Her Emails!” Comey, vaguely describing problems with his handling of Hillary Clinton’s emails.

Unmentioned by Трамп was that on Monday of this week, FBI Director Comey had requested more funds for the ongoing FBI probe into Russian influence of the 2016 elections and on the regime of Donald Трамп.

When asked about this discrepancy, the Department of Justice denied that Comey had requested those funds.

In related news, the ghost of Richard Nixon quietly smiled as he realized history may soon come to remember him as only the second most corrupt President in the history of the United States.

———

Current Vice-President and possible head vampire Mike Pence defended the regime of Donald Трамп from accusations that they had improperly fired FBI Director James Comey. Head Vampire Pence reportedly said that firing Comey was the, “right decision, right time.”

As analysts have pointed out, had the firing of Comey waited a few more weeks, his agency may have uncovered deep ties between Russia and the Трамп regime, so … can’t let that happen.

———

Speaking of the slow erosion of our Constitutional Government, a reported in West Virginia was arrested for asking Health and Human Services secretary Tom Price questions.

Daniel Ralph Heyman, 54, with the Public News Service of West Virginia, was arrested for “willful disruption of government processes,” according to a criminal complaint. The veteran reporter was shouting questions to the secretary about whether domestic violence would be considered a pre-existing condition under the proposed American Health Care Act.

In response, several progressives and moderate liberals sought reasons why Heyman’s arrest would be reasonable. One anonymous moderate said, “Well, let’s get both sides of the story, if someone is yelling, that could be scary.” Another moderate said, “Yeah, this isn’t as black and white as people are making it. If it’s black and white, it’s the government curtailing the first amendment rights of a reporter in plain site. But, if it’s murky, we can pretend that’s not happening.”

The group of moderates and counter-factual citizens sought further assurances that there was nothing to worry about, and decided to watch episodes of Rachel Ray later in the day in response.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump latest: Live updates on FBI Director Comey’s firing
http://www.cnn.com/2017/05/10/politics/trump-fires-comey-latest/index.html

Pence Calls Comey Firing ‘Right Decision’ as Democrats Pounce
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/democrats-charge-comey-firing-nixonian-demand-special-prosecutor-n757121

Va. reporter arrested for ‘yelling questions’ at HHS secretary
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/05/10/w-virginia-reporter-arrested-yelling-questions-visiting-hhs-secretary-tom-price/101503242/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.17

A deadly bomb attack killed at least 126 people trying to evacuate in busses from a besieged town in Syria, according to Syrian Observatory for Human Rights. The blast struck buses of people leaving their towns as part of a rebel-regime swap.

The regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп has been waiting patiently to determine whether the people were killed by Syria, Russia, the United States, or ISIS before condemning their deaths.

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Possible head Vampire Mike Pence made an unannounced visit Monday to the perilous Demilitarized Zone separating North and South Korea, which he called the “frontier of freedom,” as the U.S. determines its next move in the goal to escalate tensions with the hermit kingdom.

You know it’s serious when the President visits a war-zone.

On a related note, there’s still no word yet from the White House on when an official announcement about President Pence taking over for President Bannon will be made.

———

Speaking of war with North Korea, the regime of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп administration took a low-key approach to this weekend’s failed missile test in North Korea. A leading theory is that the launch was actually sabotaged by special electronics jamming equipment employed by the U.S. military.

Reportedly, White House staffers put oven mitts on Трамп’s hands to prevent him from Tweeting any state secrets about U.S. military jamming capabilities. A White House aide said that Трамп still plans on telling the regime of Vladimir Putin all about them, however.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Syria: 126 killed as bomb hits buses with evacuees, group says
http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/15/middleeast/syria-evacuations-bombing/

Vice President Mike Pence Visits Demilitarized Zone Between Koreas
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/mike-pence-lands-south-korea-after-north-s-failed-missile-n747061

Trump team remains low-key about failed North Korean missile launch
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/04/16/donald-trump-hr-mcmaster-china-north-korea/100542840/

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.04.01

In a scene seemingly out of the HBO comedy Veep, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп walked out of an Executive Signing ceremony yesterday before signing a single bill. Current Vice-President and Head Vampire Michael Pence had to chase Трамп out of the room with a copy of the Executive orders to be signed. Трамп left the room after being asked questions about Russia by a reporter.

A thoughtful Трамп then decided to resign from the Presidency effective today.

Ha, got you! April Fools! Трамп is still President!
Hah! Yeah. Трамп is still President. Yay.

———

Since the campaign of popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп went into full swing in the summer of 2015, the United States has seen a dramatic rise in hate crimes, even as the overall crime rate continues to drop. The surge in hate crimes has led lawmakers in several states, including New York, Connecticut, and Alabama to introduce new legislation to deal with the rise in cemetery desecrations, race-based shootings of people of color by white supremacists, and more.

Faced with the news, and the dawning realization of his role in this rise in white supremacist activity, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп decided to resign from the Presidency effective immediately.

No, just kidding. Трамп, man, Трамп is still President.

———

Speaking of Трамп, did you hear the latest Tweets he made? Трамп went on Twitter to make fun of journalist Chuck Todd, tweeting, “When will Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd and @NBCNews start talking about the Obama SURVEILLANCE SCANDAL and stop with the Fake Trump/Russia story?”

A savvy news media realized this was just Трамп trying to drive headlines again, and stayed focused on stories they thought mattered.

April Fools! Of course this got picked up, but luckily, only by USA Today!

Yes, USA Today, America’s favorite free newspaper to forget about reading while munching on stale donuts at a hotel in the middle of nowhere.

———

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump walks out before signing executive orders
http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/31/politics/donald-trump-executive-order-signing-walk-out/index.html

Rise in Hate Crimes Spurs States to Enhance Protections
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/rise-hate-crimes-spurs-states-enhance-protections-n738391

Trump calls out ‘sleepy eyes’ Chuck Todd, slams ‘fake news media’
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/04/01/trump-calls-out-sleepy-eyes-chuck-todd-slams-fake-news-media/99903542/

When will Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd and @NBCNews start talking about the Obama SURVEILLANCE SCANDAL and stop with the Fake Trump/Russia story?https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/848153860602507264

YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.03.31

Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп is in hot water, because it turns out that a thousand Russian agents were hired to target three key states with pro-Трамп propaganda, to help swing the election to Трамп.

Senate Intelligence Committee member Angus King, an Independent Senator who left the Democratic Party in 1993, said Friday there was “no doubt whatsoever that the Russians were behind the effort to interfere with our election.”

In response to his statement, Трамп was alleged to have ordered his staff to fan out all over Washington, D.C. and scratch out the ‘G’ in the Senator’s first name everywhere it was found.

“See! Do you SEE IT? It says Anus King now! ANUS KING!” Трамп screamed from the Oval Office.

No word yet on whether Трамп will also tweet ANUS KING at some point.

———

Speaking of anuses, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп’s former National Security Advisor, General Michael Flynn, has requested immunity in exchange for testimony about connections between the Трамп regime and Russia. In a letter from his attorney, Flynn requested immunity due to a hostile ‘witch hunt’ environment yesterday.

In a stunning rebuke, a time-travelling General Michael Flynn from September 25, 2016 appeared and reminded General Michael Flynn from March 30, 2017 that, “When you are given immunity, that means you have probably committed a crime.” At which point, General Michael Flynn reminded his time-travelling past-self, “No Duh!” before his past self-vanished in a poof of irony.

No word yet on whether Трамп knows what “irony” means or if his supporters shouting, “Lock Her Up!” a few weeks ago do, either.

———

USA Today, a hard-hitting practically socialist newspaper that you typically get at motels for free in the morning along with muffins, wrote a story about the latest tweet from popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп.

In his tweet, Трамп said General Michael “Mikhail”, “… should ask for immunity in that this is a witch hunt (excuse for big election loss), by media & Dems, of historic proportion!”

Most pundits agree with Трамп that yes, indeed, it is quite historic for a candidate and President to willingly work for a foreign power to get elected. First openly treasonous President ever! Way to go Трамп!

———

Seriously, it’s day 70 of the Трамп regime. It feels like longer, doesn’t it? I mean, that news about HYDRA agent Seb Gorka, the guy who’s in a Hungarian Nazi party, things are so crazy, that headline has fallen to near the bottom of the slush pile.

It’s basically … there’s a chance that Трамп might resign or just get ejected a lot sooner than people realize. But, if you’re a student of pop culture, you know that it means the true villain has yet to appear. Seriously, Mike Pence is not much better than Трамп. It’s kind of like, if this Sunnydale, and we were living through Buffy, it would turn out that Трамп is like some really flashy vampire, and then Mike Pence is the real head vampire.

THIS IS A SERIOUS QUESTION! Has anyone seen Mike Pence’s reflection in a mirror? And, okay, if we have, WHAT IF that idea that Vampire’s don’t show up in mirrors is a fiction? How would we know whether Pence is a vampire or not?

I think one way to know would be whether he feels like he could be alone with women. Like, Dracula, that guy, every time he was alone with women, bite ‘em in the neck, drain their blood, turn them into vampires.

If you want a sign that Pence is a vampire, look for any stories about him being afraid to be alone with women! And also if he hates garlic bread.

Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Senator: ‘No doubt whatsoever’ Russia interfered
http://www.cnn.com/videos/tv/2017/03/31/exp-senator-no-doubt-whatsoever-russia-interfered-cnntv.cnn

Russia hired 1,000 people to create anti-Clinton ‘fake news’ in key US states during election, Trump-Russia hearings leader reveals
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/russian-trolls-hilary-clinton-fake-news-election-democrat-mark-warner-intelligence-committee-a7657641.html

Flynn offers to cooperate with congressional probe in exchange for immunity
https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/flynn-offers-to-cooperate-with-congressional-probe-in-exchange-for-immunity/2017/03/30/bfd48584-159f-11e7-ada0-1489b735b3a3_story.html?hpid=hp_hp-top-table-main_flynn830p%3Ahomepage%2Fstory&utm_term=.b3468dce31df

Michael Flynn Full Interview: Trump is Opening ‘Huge’ Lead
http://www.nbcnews.com/meet-the-press/video/michael-flynn-full-interview-trump-is-opening-huge-lead-772781123974

Trump: Flynn should get immunity from possible prosecution if he talks
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/03/31/trump-flynn-should-get-immunity-possible-prosecution-if-he-talks/99860564/

Mike Flynn should ask for immunity in that this is a witch hunt (excuse for big election loss), by media & Dems, of historic proportion!
https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/847766558520856578