YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.31

After George Papadopoulos was arrested by the FBI, Donald Трамп described him as a “low-level volunteer.” During the 2016 campaign, however, Трамп described Papadopoulos, as an “excellent guy” for his foreign policy staff.

Aides believe that by Tuesday, Трамп will describe Papadopoulous as, “that guy on that old TV show, Webster.”

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Donald Трамп also reportedly called George Papadopoulos as a “liar”

People on the scene reported that when Трамп made the comment, he was looking in a mirror.

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John Kelly described Confederate War general Robert E. Lee as, “an honorable man,” and said that the Civil War was not fought over slavery, but over an inability to compromise.

Reports say that Kelly also believes that Adolf Hitler was just, “misunderstood.”

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump dismisses Papadopoulos as ‘low-level volunteer’ but once touted him
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/31/politics/donald-trump-george-papadopoulos/index.html

Trump Rips Mueller Target Papadopoulos as ‘Liar,’ ‘Low Level Volunteer’
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-rips-mueller-target-papadopoulos-liar-low-level-volunteer-n815946

John Kelly says Civil War was caused by ‘lack of the ability to compromise’; Twitter has words
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/10/31/john-kelly-says-civil-war-caused-lack-ability-compromise-twitter-has-words/816266001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.30

In court records unsealed on Monday, Трамп campaign foreign policy adviser George Papadopoulos plead guilty in July after he lied to the FBI about his interactions with foreign officials close to the Russian government.

When asked for a comment, Sarah Huckabee Sanders replied, “I can’t hear you LALALALALA.”

Sources on the scene say Sanders also had her fingers in her ears.

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Former Donald Трамп campaign manager Paul Manafort and his longtime business partner Rick Gates were indicted for a lot of charges including treason by special counsel Robert Mueller’s office announced Monday.

In response to this news, Donald Трамп has decided to wander around the White House, stuffing his pockets with silverware, historical artifacts and a fake passport.

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Donald Трамп reacted to the indictment of his former campaign chairman Monday by tweeting.

“Sorry, but this is years ago, before Paul Manafort was part of the Trump campaign,” Trump said in a tweet. “But why aren’t Crooked Hillary & the Dems the focus?????”

“Also,” he continued. “There is NO COLLUSION!”

Aides to the Трамп Regime say that later on, Donald Трамп will tweet …

 

  • “Why aren’t we talking about how badly The Apprentice did without me?”
  • “Let’s cut taxes NOW! I do not golf! You konw who golfed a lot? Obama but you don’t hear about that!”
  • “WE HAE RPUELIBCNA UNITY #MAGA”

 

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Ex-Trump campaign adviser pleads guilty to making false statement
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/30/politics/paul-manafort-russia-investigation-surrender/index.html

Manafort, Gates Charged With Conspiracy in Mueller Investigation
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/paul-manafort-rick-gates-told-surrender-special-prosecutor-probe-n815536

After Paul Manafort indictment, Trump points finger at Hillary Clinton
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/10/30/trump-manafort-indictment-response-clinton/812799001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.29

Hurricane-force winds and heavy rain are battering the Northeast on Sunday on the five-year anniversary of Superstorm Sandy.

Wood is considered the traditional gift for five year anniversaries, so if a tree branch slams into your house, that’s just nature saying, “I Love You!”

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Speaking of wood, Donald Трамп’s job approval rating has declined to 58% disapproval of his performance. 38% of people approve of his performance, while 4% are unsure about it.

In a related poll, 4% of Americans can’t tell the difference between their right and left shoes.

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Former Трамп campaign adviser Roger Stone was permanently suspended from Twitter Saturday after attacking CNN and some of the network’s on-air personalities.

Twitter said they would consider banning Donald Трамп if he uses the f-word while threatening nuclear war.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Fierce winds and heavy rain expected to hit New York on Sandy anniversary
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/29/us/new-york-northeast-storm/index.html

Trump’s Approval Rating Drops to Lowest Level Yet in New NBC News/WSJ Poll
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-s-approval-rating-drops-lowest-level-yet-new-nbc-n815321

Roger Stone suspended from Twitter
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/10/28/roger-stone-twitter-suspended/810593001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.28

Robert Mueller office will reportedly make its first indictments in the Trump Russia investigation on Monday.

Hopefully his office isn’t hit by a nuclear warhead on Tuesday.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.27

Donald Трамп personally pressed for an FBI informant’s gag order to be lifted according to White House spokesperson Kellyanne Conway, despite the request being unethical.

Other things that are unethical that Trump does anyway includes going up to beauty pageant winners and pressing on them with his lips.

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Recently declassified memos related to the JFK assassination include a note from J. Edgar Hoover written after Jack Ruby killed Lee Harvey Oswald. In the note, Hoover says, “There is nothing further on the Oswald case except that he is dead.”

Still Classified: the memo where J. Edgar Hoover asks his staff, “How do I look in these pumps?”

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Jeff Bezos is now the richest man in the world after a recent stock market rally. He’s worth $90 billion, according to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index.

It still costs you $5 to ship a box of pens from Amazon, though.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Conway confirms Trump wanted FBI informant’s gag order lifted
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/27/politics/kellyanne-conway-donald-trump-cnntv/index.html

JFK Files: J. Edgar Hoover Said Public Must Believe Lee Harvey Oswald Acted Alone
https://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/jfk-assassination-files/jfk-files-j-edgar-hoover-said-public-must-believe-lee-n814881

Amazon’s Jeff Bezos is now the richest man in the world with $90 billion
https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/news/2017/10/27/amazons-jeff-bezos-google-founders-8-6-b-richer-after-stock-surge/806099001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.26

Donald Трамп is declaring a nationwide health emergency to combat the opioid crisis at an event in the White House on Thursday.

House Democrats are considering declaring a mental health emergency over Трамп’s tweets.

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Donald Трамп has spent $1.75 million on furniture for the White House. That includes $7,000 for “furniture pedestals”, $5,000 for wallpaper, and $17,000 for custom rugs.

Трамп also reportedly spends $1.75 million per year on the custom rug he wears on his head.

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The National Archive is releasing a final batch of records about the Kennedy assassination.

According to Republican lawmakers, the final batch of records prove that Hillary Clinton was the second gunman.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

What Trump’s opioid announcement means — and doesn’t mean
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/26/politics/national-health-emergency-national-disaster/index.html

Trump Spending $1.75 Million on Presidential Furniture, Redecorations
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/trump-spent-1-75-million-presidential-furniture-redecorations-n814551

JFK files out Thursday: What to expect from secret records on Kennedy assassination
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/10/26/john-f-kennedy-assassination-archives-release-secret-jfk-files/798788001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.25

Donald Трамп, a day after public and nasty fissures opened within the Republican Party, told reporters that the Republican Party was united.

“We have great unity,” Трамп said to reporters with a straight face.

Donald Трамп has also repeatedly claimed that his hair is real.

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Former Air Force Colonel Noel Zamot was appointed Wednesday to oversee reconstruction of Puerto Rico’s hurricane-flattened electrical grid after a $300 million contract awarded to a 2-man Montana company Whitefish Energy Holdings, a small company whose owners are friends with Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke.

San Juan Mayor Carmen Yulín Cruz said the contract should be voided, and the company, which called her comments “misplaced.”

Also misplaced, the memo describing why a 2-man company from Montana got a contract to restore power to Puerto Rico!

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According to an HBO Real Sports/Marist College poll, 51% of the country believes professional sports leagues should not require their players to stand for the national anthem.

In unrelated news, the Трамп regime says that they’re planning to revoke the citizenship of 51% of Americans as soon as they can figure out how.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Touting ‘lovefest’, Trump claims no divisions in the GOP
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/25/politics/trump-lovefest-gop/index.html

Puerto Rico Mayor, Montana Firm Feud on Twitter Over Restoring Power
https://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/puerto-rico-crisis/puerto-rico-mayor-montana-firm-feud-twitter-over-restoring-power-n814476

Americans opposed to pro sports leagues requiring players stand for national anthem
https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nfl/2017/10/25/americans-opposed-pro-sports-leagues-requiring-players-stand-national-anthem/801086001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.24

Republican Senator Jeff Flake of Arizona gave a speech bemoaning the changing tenor of politics in the United States.

“If I have been critical, it’s not because I relish criticizing the behavior of the President of the United States,” Flake said. “If I have been critical, it is because I believe that it is my obligation to do so, as a matter of duty and conscience.”

Ladies and gentlemen, let’s have a warm round of applause for Jeff Flake, who voted 90% of the time in agreement with Donald Трамп and only starts speaking out when it’s time to retire! NOTE: Jeff Flake also voted NO on aid to Puerto Rico.

The Republican Party: Big Talk After They Decide To Walk!

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Senate Democrats have questioned whether Michael Dourson, Donald Трамп’s pick to lead the EPA, is violating the law by working at the agency before being confirmed, and they are demanding more details about his duties.

In response, a White House spokesperson sent the Senate Democrats a YouTube video of Sylvester Stallone as Judge Dredd saying, “I am the Law!” on an endless loop.

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USA TODAY discovered that since 2013, military investigators have documented at least 500 cases of serious misconduct among its generals, admirals and senior civilians, almost half of those instances involving personal or ethical lapses.

The number is expected to double in the first year of the Трамп regime, but will fall to 0 by 2018. When asked why, a Pentagon spokesperson said, “The easiest way for us to get rid of misconduct is to remove the ethics rules in the first place. Трамп will go for that!”

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Flake’s speech burning Trump gets standing ovation from some Republicans
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/24/politics/jeff-flake-retirement-arizona/index.html

Democrats Question if Trump EPA Nominee Is Violating the Law
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/democrats-question-if-trump-epa-nominee-violating-law-n813881

Senior military officials sanctioned for more than 500 cases of serious misconduct
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/10/24/generals-sex-misconduct-pentagon-army-sanctions-hagel-gillibrand/794770001/

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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.23

Myeshia Johnson, the widow of Sgt. La David Johnson, told CNN that Donald Трамп’s condolence call about the death of her husband made her cry.

“(The call) made me cry because I was very angry at the tone of his voice,” she said.

White House aides say the 2003 ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner will be hung on the White House tomorrow morning in response.
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The long-awaited sentencing of Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl was delayed Monday after Donald Трамп said he couldn’t talk about the case on October 16 and then added, “But I think people have heard my comments in the past.”

Bergdahl’s lawyers have argued that the only way to ensure a fair sentence now is to take any possible jail time off the table.

Reports say that General Kelly is planning to take ice-cream off the table for Трамп for the forseeable future due to his latest gaffe.
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The Food and Drug Administration’s new chief says he doesn’t want to repeat the mistakes made when he was at the agency in the 2000s and the government failed to regulate opioids more, and expressed regret to the media.

The FDA will continue its policy of inaction, but promises to continue their current policy of expressing regret about the crisis.
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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump disputes military widow’s account of condolence call
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/23/politics/gma-myeshia-johnson-trump/index.html

Bowe Bergdahl’s Sentencing Delayed Over Trump’s Comments
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/bowe-bergdahl-s-sentencing-delayed-over-trump-s-comments-n813251

FDA chief supports opioid prescription limits, regrets agency’s prior inaction
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/10/23/fda-chief-supports-opioid-prescription-limits-regrets-agencys-prior-inaction/774007001/
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YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.10.22

Donald Трамп, a human meatball currently living in the White House, on Saturday attacked Democratic congresswoman Frederica Wilson and called her “wacky.” CNN then ran the headline, “Trump keeps up attack on ‘wacky’ congresswoman over Gold Star call.”

So, for everyone keeping score at home, the black Congresswoman with the cowboy hat is wacky, but Roy Moore, the white guy with the cowboy hat who pulled out a gun on stage is just “running for Senate.”
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A team of scientists who trek daily daily into Puerto’s Rico’s El Yunque National Forest have spotted the endangered Puerto Rican parrot. This is the first hopeful sign of life in Puerto Rico since Hurricane Maria.

Reports say that Eric Трамп is planning to fly to Puerto Rico to shoot the parrot, and either keep it with his Lion skin trophys or possibly eat it.

No word yet on whether or not Eric Трамп would eat the parrot raw.

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USA Today reported that U.S Customs and Border Patrol is unsure about the specifications for Donald Трамп’s border wall. Secret budget overruns on the project have all been attributed to a lack of understanding about what the Donald Трамп regime wants.

U.S. Customs and Border Patrol denied this claim, and produced a document showing the detailed specification. Spokesperson Jack Gooseberry said, “See this cocktail napkin? This guy, in the sombrero, that’s people Donald Трамп doesn’t want in the country. And this line, this is the wall. It’s really specific.”

Gooseberry then took a shot of tequila and abruptly ended the interview.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump keeps up attack on ‘wacky’ congresswoman over Gold Star call
http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/21/politics/trump-tweets-wilson-gold-star/index.html

In Puerto Rico, a Hopeful Sight: Endangered Parrot Spotted After Hurricane Maria
https://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/puerto-rico-crisis/puerto-rico-hopeful-sight-endangered-parrot-spotted-after-hurricane-maria-n812346

Behind efforts to build prototypes of Trump’s border wall, emails show a confusing and haphazard process
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/10/22/behind-efforts-build-prototypes-trumps-border-wall-emails-show-confusing-and-haphazard-process/787080001/

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